Wednesday, October 29, 2003

cracklin' rosie

i am so weird at work.
as in, i'm a more reserved tim pratt.
i mean, i'm still me, in the me sense.
don't you love the me sense?
i do.
anyway (one of my favorite and helpful words for my wandering mind - because i'm the king of tangents, of attempting to constantly overcram all the shit i can in my skull each day)....and no, i'm not a fan of "anywhoo."
with the extended "ooh" sound especially.
that's bullshit man.
bullshit i say.

i so want to be super over the top in real life.
like when i was walking down 16th today

i am so in my self-created bubble, my tim pratt think tank, to ruminate on the the tim pratt everyone else sees. helps me keep my sanity to go into deep tim pratt-ville.
keeps me sane yo.
and god knows, the world needs me sane.
because insane, well sir, there'd be trouble.
but enough about twinkies.

dolly madison was pretty damn cool.
for a bonnet-wearing person.
james madison was her kick-ass husband, whom i seem to remember was a pretty rocking president.

i think george w. bush, our fake-ass chump for a fake president, has to be one of our worst.
worst than william henry harrison.
worst than gerald ford, who was never elected.

i like zachary taylor purely because he has a cool name?

remember the zero factor?
you know, george bush could pull a makaveli (because i can't spell the old school way and i'm too damn lazy to look up the correct one) and have us vote for his pseudo-dead ass because we all feel bad, and then he turns out to be ok.

like the day after the election, he emerges totally via the strength of knowing a solid 51% of the electorate are behind him (of course, rigged by those touch screens that are heavily funded by GOP monsters - but that's for another day, another struggle in this thing we call life man, fucking a.)

caller go ahead.

my girlfriend is a heroin pig.

not MY girlfriend, as in, tim pratt's girlfriend.

i've lapsed once again into creative laziness, biting quotes from bruce mccolluch's "heroin pig" track.
he is so awesome.
i totally did not appreciate kids in the hall while it was popular.
it required me to be older, wiser and more a man of the world, a man of the people, for me to appreciate the fine nuanced (another fave word of late) world of kids in the hall.
i should have said humor but fuck it. i go with spontaniety every time.

except for sometimes.

you know, in the last sentence, i almost typed "accept" (as in that great german band from the 80s, with that fine hit "balls to the wall" man! fronted by the dimunitive - another fave word from circa-80s circus and hit parader magazines, which i read religiously - puto) by accident.

that would have sucked.
i hate it when people use the wrong word, or at least, the wrong spelling.
i abhor misspellings, unless it's me being lazy (i'm very good at that, despite the fact that i'm insanely busy all the fucking time..i wish i didn't have to sleep, though i do like to sleep - ah the limitations -- and lamentations for you bible listeners -- of being human).

like earlier today, when i was hanging with my good pal that helps me out with specific needs that i have occasionally.
she has this art piece up in her bathroom, where i was hanging out for awhile just because i like to hang out in the bathroom to really think about buttcakes, words like bilious and cheerios, which i still like as long as they have a light sprinkling of cane sugar, but only on the first bowl. she has this piece that references "capitolism"....but see, anybody that gets really fucking annoyed/pissed off/enraged/outraged/somewhat raged about misspellings or wrong usage in a sentence, would know that it should be spelled "capitalism."
i mean come on, especially here in san francisco, where there are a lot of people who are against capitalism, especially socialists, marxists, nazis, neonazis, neocons, neo soul fans, and nepotism fans of freddie prinze jr..

i interrupt my totally coherent thoughts to relay to you that currently, i'm hearing car tires squealing pretty regularly every 20 seconds or so for the last 3 minutes.
quite odd.

frank the black haired kitty is currently laying in my lap. he has a fine tail.
i must say.
some kitties don't have fine tails, only somewhat good tails but this kitty towers above other kitties, i must say.

and i do say, obviously.

i say obviously a lot, in my writing at least.
don't you love how self-analytical i am?

i'm like two people, one to watch and record what i do, and then the one that just does.
i do.

this kitty frank has been discriminated against because of the color of his fur.
some people (like say, oh..our idiotic attorney general, one john asscroft - misspelling completely intentional for you non believers and christians of all creeds) really freak out about black cats.
which is weird.
i mean, witches like 'em. and fuck, witches are usually pretty cool, even if they have poor eating habits, bad hygiene, and a subpar wardrobe selection (i mean, come on...ditch those cheap-ass pointy hats already...go for something in plaid or mauve).

one witch requirement is to have a mole of some sort on your face, particularly the nose and/or chin.
for optimum evilness.

see, cuz god is punishing witches because they're like evildoers and stuff, so they automatically become ugly once they start flying around on their brooms.

fuck..i need a beverage.
more in a few.

Tuesday, October 28, 2003

yo ho ho, we gots a party coming up at lipo lounge this friday night just in time for halloween. unfortunately, the link on the latest issue of flavorpill to my name is NOT ME.
which really sucks. but what can you do?
in the meantime, just know that THIS tim pratt lives and breathes for marshmallow soup.
and gelatin sideburns.

makes no sense, huh?
neither does this blog.

upward and downward

Tuesday, October 21, 2003

ruminating on various music for your kindness and consideration

Flow Motion: Visual Pleasure, Vol. 2.0 (Elektrolux)

it tows less closely to the floaty ambient soundscape stuff in favor of more crackly, fragment bits.

Though the album is all material that's been previously released, it's doubtful even your most ardent experimental fan has heard everything on here.

it's�eloquent, soothing, IDM-type, a bit more complex than meandering synth washes and soundscapes. feels fluid. Soehngenetic's "Wall King SL"

mum "The ballad of the broken birdie records" - nice warm crackle of chopped up keyboards skipping down the audio lane, haunting child like vocals not unfamiliar in a haunted house (think boards of canada on speed).

some tracks more compelling than others.

aural float - sort of reggae/dub beat

�hmm, lapses into some new age cheesiness from time to time though.

and here's the review
Combining the visual representation with experimental and ambient electronic music is a no-brainer, so it makes perfect sense that late night German TV shows such as "Flowmotion" and "Space Night," emphasizing tripped-out motion and fluidity over structure, have become popular with aging electronic music fans. Germany's Elektrolux label plays host to this impressive array of experimental artists (including Iceland's Mum, Aural Float, The Sushi Club and UNN) on Flowmotion: Visual Pleasure, Vol. 2.0, favoring more of the crackly, fragmented audio bits, soothing textures and somewhat perky beat arrangements than the floaty ambient soundscapes prevalent on the Space Night soundtracks. While not every track is a keeper, there are plenty of highlights by the likes of Index ID, Mum and Rescape to fend off the occasional lapse into new age cheese.

electrelane - first single On Parade from album "the power one" (too pure) - pretty good, tight fisted rock for the nonmasses.
ooh, a cover of springsteen's "i'm on fire." recorded by steve albini in chicago, so it's got that shellac quality to it.

i am still digging on the flaming lips' "thank you jack white for that fiber optic jesus that you gave me." awesome. i was playing that the other day at my birthday shindig at Tilden Park and then my friend Stephan shows up with a fucking fiber optic jesus picture (the fact that i called my party a Fellowship may have something to do with the jesus-related items - i also got a Jesus Bacon illustration from my damn fine friend MollyGoLightly

no no no. not the flaming lips you want to hear.

this time it's "Duck Dodgers" main title song being sung by tom jones and performed by the flaming lips. wow sound quality is horrible. it's kitschy alright but eh..
wow, the sound is just bad. but song sucks too. reminds me of vegas. pass

i just saw eric shea on the street. and said hello. he said nothing in return but he did have a shit-eating grin on his face. probably baked.
ah, yes.

damn, i'm in a good mood. being confident really really helps. on days when i'm confident.

last night i dreamt that i was friends with eninem and he was wearing those glasses of his. we were at his house but for some reason it was in the bay area, not michigan and his wife was a stupid bitch. that part must be reality.
it's probably because i remember reading a story about some dolt who sued him because he namechecked some asshole bully when he was a kid who used to push him around. awesome that he did that, that enimem namechecked the bitch. god knows i had plenty of ass fucks make me an angry young boy, pushing me around and such. i'm glad the judge threw out the case, which included a fucking rap! awesome. i love america. sometimes.

i don't recall much of the gist of the dream but we were hangiing out and talking, like we were old friends. ha.

lisa marie presley sessions@aol - better than i would have imagined i guess. singer songwriter type not that far off from a sheryl crow (she's is like the quintessential female singer songwriter to compare too, probably because she's so goddamn ubiquitious - where isn't sheryl crow?. she was even at johnny cash's funeral. christ, and then we got her greatest hits today. ok, she has a few hits. "a change will do you good" is pretty catchy. but shut up).

anyway, lisa marie. she's got an interesting vocal style. not bad, really. good genes, obviously. husky vocals, atmospheric. i'm down with it. the third song, "sinking in" is really quite good.

hmmm, i have to write an average of 1661 words a day in november. yep, i'm going to write a novel in a month thanks to this, National Novel Writing Month, staring Nov. 1, of course.
my first published book will be dedicated to vv and jl. ____ ___u.

...more music for people with lives....

The Long Winters When I pretend to fall (Barsuk) - seattle band, nice artwork.
wow, solid pop and i REALLY dig the horns. nice touch. good husky wry vocals and odd organs. strangely compelling. ramshackle acoustic americana-esque indie rock. really good and emotional.

Clem Snide A Beautiful EP (spinart) - awesome. they do a cover of christina aguilera's "beautiful" which is really good.
"Mike Kalinsky" what a funny song bout a kid who has asthma, always misses school but still does better on tests than everyone else. "spinning bottles never pointed his way." listened to joy division in his bedroom and going nowhere. explodes in the end, detailing what mike's band sounds like today (loud punk).
also covers velvet underground's "I'll be your mirror" complete with a cello.

mando diao bring 'em in (Mute) -totally '60s-ish garage rock, but really fucking solid just the same. i like the production, stripped down and all fuzzy. very go-go 60s vibe but more hard. sorta jon spencer blues explosion-ish in third song "motown blood." very solid rock, for sure.

Rickie Lee Jones The Evening Of My Best Day (V2) - i've never been a fan, best known for "chuck e's in love" from 1979, but this album is surprisingly solid, a shuffling jazz-based mix of atmospheric, oddly melodic songs. nice production. think folky suzanne vega with a more kid-like voice.
if you like early steely dan, you might like this. love the flute and mellow carefree vibe. feels like a warm summer day. even has songs sung in french.

the shins chutes too narrow (sub pop) - damn good pop rock delicately written songs that are just so damn endearing. LOVE the rapturous synths.�love james mercer's vocals and lyrics. even the artwork is awesome. lyrics are great. production is great. cute yet not cute pop.
i would say this is on my top 10 of the year.
yes, i would.
don't question my kielbasa either fuckpiss.
ain't no processions 'round here maestro.
ok i have to announce my upcoming halloween party and pitchfork my eyes out with alligator syrup.

remember to look both ways before humping.

and always always always skin your own potatoes. there's bacteria in there you know.
grandma always liked spaghetti.




Monday, October 20, 2003

my bonnie lies over the ocean

oh my oh me oh what oh hee.

good golly miss molly, i know you got a lot to say. but you ain't going fucking nowheres unless you give up some pay.

yeah man, i sure do love biscuits graveyards and peanuts.
better than onions my friend, better than onions.
or mayonaisse if you catch my drift.

or nobby.

look at that man sitting in the tree.
first comes love,
then comes marriage
then you're pushing a baby carriage.

elevator musik by the rez band really sucked.

oh and check out adam ant. he's a fine fellow is he not?

grandma chicken for sure.
Adam Ant's fine new song

stone cold shiver.

saturday evening, i was treated to a lovely, just lovely, dining experience at san francisco's beloved Hooters franchise, in your favorite place, Fisherman's Wharf.
Ah, the irony.
Culture shock, to be sure, but admittedly, it was also a smirking good time. at one point, our voluptuous 18-year-old waitress from pacifica asked me (after being tipped off by my preening hosts, fools!) if i'd like to go out in the middle of hooters and be embarassed in front of a crowd of rowdy males predominantly aged 15-22.
"of course!" i said.
i was led to the middle of the restaurant, whereby i was given two medium sized balloons that were then stuck up my shirt by our darling waitress and told to stand on a chair next to the two other birthday boys.
naturally, i began rubbing my big breasts immediately, much to the delight of the youngsters present.
after being introduced as turning 21 (!), i stepped down and gave up my breasts. satisfied.

family hour, for sure.

Wednesday, October 08, 2003

stop the madness

remember that exercise woman that looked like a cross between annie lennox and brigitte nielsen from the late 80s and/or early 90s?
she would always yell "Stop The Madness!" or so i recall.
Susan powter was her name. you loved her more than anything.

and speaking of recalls, man, i must say, i shore do think this here state's gonna solve all of its problems now that Commando is in charge.

(and if you ever saw the fine feature film Commando, you would know of what i speaketh.
or spake).


but today my problem lies with music reviewers who use the word "Teutonic" to describe any musical artist that's German. Don't believe me? here's a stupid example.

The world tastes good because the Candy Man thinks it should.

Tuesday, October 07, 2003

don't leave your casket without preparation F.
you'll never be so happy to be dead again.

and oh yeah, fuck pears.
Choose Your Favorite Doom Scenario
Davis Recalled by GOP Power Grab
Arnold Wins
A's/Giants Lose In The Same Weekend
Bush is Still Our Fake President

This is what I�m currently doing right now, super multitasking: ripping cds on my mac upstairs, listening to election updates on NPR on my portable radio i have in my kitchen, where i'm working on my girlfriend's laptop, playing music on my brand new JBL loudspeakers and just purchased stanton turntable.
i'm also sort of reading Newsweek, answering email, reading online updates of the election via SF Gate, making and drinking coffee, enjoying some of the finer herbs that this state has to offer, sucking on a delicious sugarfree mint, fending off kitty whining and such, and general misconduct on all levels.
i've also got my cell and home phones next to me, and i'm using my mouse from ANOTHER Mac in the house for this laptop usage deal. because laptop mice suck.

ra bless us everyone.

First fearless prediction of 2004: Bill Murray wins best actor academy award.

i need to start using the word 'cabal' in more sentences i write and say. i don't know if i've ever actively used that word in a sentence.

so, arnold is our new governor.
ya fucking who.
pathetic, the GOP is.
simply pathetic.

and of course, there's discourse outside my door:
whalers wailing in the street, huge throngs of people on the alameda pier pushing propane tanks into the bay, while legions of others are fast approaching with battering rams, attempting to kill all free-thinking humans left; and then there's the white tiger who mauled Roy is on the loose in oakland, though the tiger seems to be pretty happy and relaxed. he was just sick of being in vegas and had a find a way to get away from Roy, who was always hitting him in the nose.

maybe...ok, i could be lying snatch-a-holics.

well, since i'm only at home since i found out about the new impending doom that is the new reality in the state of caleefonya.

it's fucking idiotic, this recall, and appalling.

I'm sickened by the GOP like never before. what a joke, these pathetic loser men that have to make a power grab because they don't like the way the election turned out for them.

i say revenge is sweet, bitches.

the one positive is this has all politicians feeling some tightening in their chests, as they realize that no one is safe, even after being elected. you can be yanked out of office and i'll think you'll see similar recall propositions in other states within the next few years.

probably with less loopholes, i would hope, like this one.

...oh my god. gray just said (i'm listening to his concession speech on NPR) that the stage, containing his wonderful mother, is a "no-cry zone. maybe we can cry later tonight but not on stage here."
yes, he IS a very odd man.

but jesus, this seems pretty harsh. what do you do now if you're gray davis?
killing yourself only makes you look more weak.
so that's not an option.


alright, we have no choice.
let's see what ol' "Commando" can do.
like ruin the state even more, just like our fake-ass liar 'president.'

ok, i'm going to watch tv now. you love those things.
yes, you do.

remember to pout.