Friday, December 31, 2004

Last Day of the Fucking Year

it was a FUCKING year, was it not?
i glanced back at my entries from about august through november and they're filled with a lot of vitriol (not undeserved, mind you) toward W. and the GOP at large.
I still hate them, but i had to let that shit recede so it didn't completely consume me. and it did consume me.
as many have said, i felt like someone had died the day after the election, or i should say, the several days after the election.
it was hard.
fucking sucked.
but we have to deal. we have to accept this. and pray that things will be ok.
a lot to ask i realize.

so what am i doing today?
enjoying my day off (second day in a row! four day weekend yo! fuck yeah bitches), getting my cds together, finally, though i'm realizing how big of a job it really is. christ almighty for heaven's sake.

what else am i doing?
drinking Red Tail. a damn fine red ale from Ukiah, Calif. i've found i really like a lot of California beers. it really does feel like i've moved to a different country here in California.
i love it here. even with all the bullshit, all the people, all the everything. still worth it.

all of it.
love love love california. this is my home.
though i had a good visit back to my native land of grand rapids, michigan, last week. a week ago today was christmas eve, unbelievably, and i was just getting on the road to head north to Ensley Center, near Howard City, Michigan, to see my dad's mom. she just turned 80 recently. i love talking to her. i love talking to both my grandmothers actually. i've bonded with them the last few years, since i've moved West. always talking about the past, it seems. i guess i'm the only one in the family that's so interested in the past...but that's what grandmothers have, above all else. experience. life experience. the past. remembering where we came from.
i love all that.
the reason i'm here right now writing this is because of the decisions of my ancestors before. yeah, i know how it sounds, but i really do think about this a lot. it's important, to know where you came from, i feel. we have so little else to hang onto these days. i don't want to forget about my past, my family.

so there it is.
2004 is less than 9 hours from being over.
it's crazy.
2004 was a fucked up crazy year.
i realize we are living in very unique times. i feel lucky to be living through a time of such great, fast-moving change.
though the concept that i'm continuing to age is a little strange for me.
the bad cliche that it is, "time marches on" still rings true.
it's messed up.

my stomach growls right now.
i gained at least five pounds over the holidays.
not that i should be surprised. i'm not.
though i'm bummed because i was just starting to let the weight drop lately.
oh well, back on to the leaner diet for me, i'm sure.
i've done well this year, quitting soda pop being a huge feat for me.
no shit.
i've been drinking soda pop since i was a small child. hence, why my teeth should be in slightly better shape than they currently are. they ain't falling out just yet, but i'm going to have to worry about it till the rest of my life.

so yeah, rock.
things are changing.
everything is changing.
the whole world is changing.
understatement of the year, no?

of course.
and still i smoke weed.
i do.
i don't care if people know.
fuck it.
it shouldn't be illegal, and in my world, it pretty much isn't.
people here really don't care.
everybody i know smokes at least once or twice a year.
though most i know smoke much more than that.
sure, i realize smoking is still bad, even if it's not smoking cigarettes, which is much much worse.
and i quit that shit may 3, 1999, at 6:38 p.m. EST in Grand Rapids, Michigan.
tis true.
yeah, i've had a few cigarettes since that day, but very very few. and i didn't have ANY cigarettes at all for at least three years, in fact i think one of my first was christmas 2002, when i got super sick from smoking a marlboro 100 of wendie's in fort wayne.
that sucked ass.
i stink currently.

i like the word bloke
i think i have UK envy.
i plan to be in the UK in 2005.
i plan to be in europe more than once.

it is my destiny.
you should say destiny like this "desss-tiiiii-neeeeeyyyyy"
like Darth Vader was saying that shit, you know?

i am serious.
i'm listening to The Streets right now, and right now, with my smoking bowl next to me, cranked up super loud, the rain coming down above me atop the ceiling window i can't recall the name of, the Red Tail next to me. it all works monsignor.

and then a song called "dry your eyes" comes on and you realize that matt was right...the streets (i.e. the guy who is the streets) is too self-serious, too self-important, trying just a little bit too hard.

oh man.
Tina makes porn lighters. she sold three of them to the dude that fixed our shower yesterday.
see, our shower has sucked lately, because the hot water has been getting shittier and shittier, barely a dribble, and there was more than one day i felt like i was suffering mightily in my dribbly, pathetic shower, as i tried in vain to wash my hair with the sort-of there water, the rest of my body shivering in shitty coldness.
fuck it sucked.
finally we got it fixed. it's all better now.
still in time for the new year, you see.

man, 2005.
crazy shit.
how did i get here?
where did i come from?
why am i here?
what the hell am i doing?

questions we all ask ourselves, i think.

what the fuck?
what the fuck?

this world, this time, the people that currently dwell upon it....what is really happening right now?
momentous it seems, yes.
big times, we live in.

everything is changing.
i'm ready for the change.

oh yeah.
fuck mother fucking yeah!

i made it this far.....

Wednesday, December 29, 2004

The Longest Wait

the light at trimble road and orchard is the worst. the lights here in san jose make absolutely no sense whatsoever. retarded. they make you wait forever. sometimes you'll be wanting to turn left and the people going in the same direction as you, but not turning, get 2-3 green lights before you get a left turn green light.
it's an outrage.
and i wonder if these damn lights work on sensors or something because it's damn near impossible to get three green lights in a row on Trimble. Despicable, as Daffy Duck would say.
Christ, i've got barrel fever. and i don't even know what the fuck barrel fever is.

i need coffee.

2:30 p.m.
here's a more thorough analaysis of what might happen to San Francisco if a similar thing causing a tsunami were to happen off the California coast.
IT COULD HAPPEN HERE: S.F. coastline susceptible to huge quake-triggered waves

Tuesday, December 28, 2004

People Who Died

Elizabeth Kubler-Ross notwithstanding, i think our society still has big issues with death and dealing with it.
Even using the word 'dead,' as in, 'Your grandfather is dead,' freaks a lot of people out. Instead, they use words like "John passed away," "Granddad went to be with his Lord," or "Elmer passed."

They're dead. Just like the Jim Carroll song.

anyway, dead people are still interesting. i like to make a mental note regarding a person's living/nonliving status from year-to-year. call me morbid, and you can, but i really do find it comforting and fascinating in some strange way. i mean, not to say i'm necessarily happy about a person's death, but it's an inevitability that affects us all. so why not just accept it?

that all said, here's a comprehensive list of notable people who died in 2004 from the local newspaper rag.
No pictures. you'll have to find those somewhere else.
btw, the December 26 issue of the New York Times Magazine has a great year-end rundown of significant people who died. Not necessarily comprehensive, but that's OK.

Death to death.

and i can't not post this interesting story, which i first heard on the Today show this morning.
Ecstasy to be tested on terminal patients
More than a bit ironic, considering MDMA is considered one of the Schedule 1 drugs the DEA tries to consistently bust people with.
Frankly, i think MDMA would be a viable solution for some terminal patients. at the very least, it'll put someone in a happy place for a while. And if they're terminal, it's not like you have to worry about potential brain damage, you know?

Ashes to ashes.
supplemental: Now that the death toll in Southeast Asia has hit an unbelievable 59,000 and counting (crazy shit), many here in the Bay Area, myself included, wondered about the chances of something like this devastating the Northern California coastline.
here are some answers.
apparently, we're not in as much potential danger as Southeast Asia, mainly because of the deep drop-off of the ocean floor about 10 miles out in the Pacific.

The devastation in Southeast Asia is beyond words. Beyond horrible.
here are a few links to keep updated on the devastation.
Reporters Log: Asia Disaster
Eyewitness: Sri Lanka tsunami
South-East Asia Earthquake & Tsunami
Asia's Deadly Waves
Across the Globe, a Warning Sounded
World Changing

oh my! Christmas is late this year! but it was worth it!

Leonard Nimoy (Spock) delivers up an amazing song of intrigue and joy about Bilbo Baggins, the greatest little hobbit of them all.


Monday, December 27, 2004

Back from the Freezer

Yes, it's true, i have returned virtually unscathed from the Freezing Ass cold that was Michigan.
When i left there early christmas morning, it was 5 degrees.

Horrible, to say the least.

So i'm a bit tired right about now, plugged in with my headphones on and staring at the computer screen i call home here at work.

I managed to visit with nearly all the people i wanted to visit with, barring a few peeps that managed to slip through.
Here tis a few notable things i've been sent today:

Is Your Desk Making You Sick?
This should appeal to nearly anyone who works in an office, like myself. Watch what you're picking up! and clean that keyboard as much as possible.


Forward Ever
This here's a brand new blog from Tomas, outgoing editor of XLR8R magazine. Seems like it might be pretty cool.


Rumsfeld says 9-11 plane 'shot down' in Pennsylvania
Wow, this is quite a stunning slip and/or declaration made by the increasingly embattled Rumsfeld. People should really be looking into this deeper.


Massive Earthquake Kills Over 23,000 Across Indian Ocean Region
The tsunami in Southeast Asia is beyond frightening, especially since i live so damn close to the Pacific Ocean and has made me reassess potential emergency situations that could happen here.

For some up-close-and-personal pics from the scene, check out these scary pics from Phuket.


The iPod Generation
Great story on one of the hottest trends, and changing the way we listen to music. I know i've been forever changed by iTunes (probably more so than my iPod actually) and the iPod.


Hooray For Ulrich!
anybody that knows me, understands my intense -- and recent -- devotion to Ulrich Schnauss, triggering the classic "how did i not know about him before?"
anyway, here's an mp3 blog with some great downloads of past and present work by Mr. Schnauss.
you know he's going to be near or at the top of my list of best albums of 2004. stay tuned for that post later this week.


Speaking of best albums of 2004, i just realized that the Detroit Free Press, for whom i've been a longtime contributor, printed their top albums of 2004.
My contributions are: Scissor Sisters, Magnetic Fields and Ulrich Schnauss.
so right there, you already know three albums that will be making my top 10 of the year.


ya'll come back now, ya here?

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Laptopping in Detroit Metro

Detroit Metro Airport
7:12 a.m. EST (4:12 a.m. my time)
listening to: "Chillosophy 3" compilation

This is the kind of time that i've always wanted to relish.
And now i can assuredly relish this time.
You know, the now time.
the here and now time.
i'm sitting here at my gate, A21, waiting for my flight to Grand Rapids in a couple hours.
and i'm stoked because i'm sitting at my gate, typing this out, surfing wirelessly via my lovely laptop that i adore oh so much.
in fact, i'm mr. plugged in right about now.
on my right sits my iPod, the battery near-death and in desperate need of rejuvenation, plugged into my firewire outlet.
on my left is my power cord, plugged in to one of the few plugs i've seen. but now armed with a laptop, my whole outlook in airports is all about finding a random plug i can use.
so that wasn't too difficult to do.
my headphone jack is running out of the computer as well, so i'm quite closed off from the world around me.
which is a cavernous terminal (to say the least) here in Detroit Metro but quite clearly the only nice part of detroit metro, i must say. the rest of the airport here sucks ass. for sure.
oh, i've also using the other plug for my phone to recharge.

i've got a few schedule while i'm here visiting michigan. which is cold ASS, by the way.
in fact, i'm going to check the temperature.
Ok, we're rocking out at 27 degrees. could be worse.
not to say i'm happy about it, but not unexpected.
this is my homeland, my native land from whence i did come.
but now, no longer do i live.

apparently there is more shitty winter weather coming though.
we were greeted here in detroit one.
there was nobody at the terminal when we arrived, or i should say, nobody at our gate.
so we sat on the plane more than 30 minutes until they opened the goddamn doors.
thankfully, i was in no great rush, since i knew i was sitting here in the airport for a few hours until my flight left.
i even thought about the idea of me renting a car and driving to grand rapids rather than wait for my flight.
but why the hell would i want to do that?
this is why i fly.
so i don't have to make unnecessary shitball trips in the car when i don't have to.
better for me to be sitting here, writing about random crap i see, ya see?

i enjoyed a hearty (well..) breakfast at mcdonald's this morning after we were finally let off the plane.
somehow the rule about not eating at mcdonald's doesn't necessarily apply at airports. i chalk it up to lack of options.
combined with the fact that nothing was open when i first got here.

i must say, i am stoked i was sitting inbetween two thin women. a girl from SF (well, she just moved to Mill Valley, as she told me) originally from Detroit. she was kind of funny actually. because she was sitting in the window seat, she let me know that she was going to be needing to go to the bathroom soon enough. i was like 'it's all good' and did a cartwheel down the aisle.
ok, so the last part was in my head, but it was glorious, i tell you.
but yeah, later on, when it was obvious that me, being the unlucky dude in the middle, and the aisle woman, she who was cracking me up with her earnest sort of new ageness soccer mom type (she called her husband right before we took off to tell him to make sure and remember to cut out this article that she wanted saved for her, also did a 'i love you'), were getting comfortable because window girl goes, pretty bossy pants like, 'now you guys, don't get too comfortable, i'm gonna have to go to the bathroom you know (she hadn't gone yet, you see). it was pretty funny. we talked for a bit.
but yeah, i am happy i wasn't stuck in between two giants or loudmouths or screaming babies.
i was able to sleep, which i did, soundly, i might add. i was pretty damn tired. of course, the special cookie M gave me last weekend definitely helped. i was a little more messed up than i planned to be, but it also put me to sleep forthwith.

one thing i hate about coming to michigan is that i often end up flying Northwest and they consistently suck. this flight was better than many i've had but still, the planes seem chintzy and cheap. definitely the less is more type o shit, you know?

oh so, a good reminder for myself. juice up your iPod before you go on a trip. i felt like a dumb ass when i excitedly turned on my iPod, only to realize that the damn thing was pretty much dead.
and god, i had my laptop plugged in at work all day Tuesday. crapola motorola.
so that was just me being a dumb ass.

there's a fair amount of people already waiting for ol' grand rapids. and we don't even board for another hour. oh actually, i think we leave in little over an hour, 8:55 a.m. to be exact.
so we probably board in an hour.

man, i stink right now. and i didn't eat much. and that mcdonald's definitely hasn't hit me yet.
oh yeah, that's what i forgot to expand upon.
mcdonald's breakfast doesn't seem quite as bad as the meals. i mean, i saw 'super size me.' i know it's shit for food.
but i only had an egg mcmuffin, hash browns and an OJ.
not bad, right?

it's funny. many times, i see girls from grand rapids who are with boys but if i saw the same girls in san francisco, i'd think they were lesbians. the athletic not-so-girly types. i just saw a couple and the girl just didn't quite fit. it was funny.
a guy is walking by me right now very fast, just got off the plane. clearly, he has to go to the bathroom bad.

ok, i suppose i should use part of my time in my hour session here to check my email and shit.

i've got a full schedule while i'm here in grand rapids.
going to see grandma parks this morning, after i get my rental car that is.
then stop in to say hello to my moma, then go hang out with my friend kevin tonight, someone i haven't seen in several years.
also going to hit up troy, christine and some other peeps, kim kibby, rob, my brother, anybody i can.
i've got three days here. i go back christmas morning.
yes, a very quick stay.
it's funny, i see all this activity right now and i can't hear a goddamn thing because i'm wearing my big ol' headphones.
cracking me up.

aw yeah.
i'll probably add more if i see more this morning.
i've also got the new Lord of the Rings deluxe edition dvd, so i'll be checking some of that, though i may do that on the plane. who knows.

holy shit, so i just checked the weather in Grand Rapids right now and it's not looking too good for me.
here's the current advisory, i.e. what i have to look forward to in a couple hours.
>>Lake effect snow showers will continue across the area throughout the remainder of the morning. Visibility will drop to as low as one mile in some of the heavier showers. A few tenths of an inch of snow per hour is possible with the greatest amounts expected along and west of us31 near the Lakeshore. Travel may become troublesome due to the blowing snow and minor accumulations. Very cold temperatures in the teens and twenties will combine with gusty winds to drop wind chills into the single digits this morning.>>

lucky me! whoo hoo!
damn man, that blows.
i suppose i should call my brother.
and send greetings of pure joy and thankless testimony. yes.

so there's one of these walkway things they have at airports to speed you along the long distances and it's funny, i keep looking at people as they go by, and when one catches my eye, i may stare a little longer than normal. and i see that they feel they're being stared at. they may glance back. it's interesting. two dudes just went by on the walkway going the wrong way, on purpose, as they seemed to walk with authority. or at least, adamantly.

Monday, December 20, 2004

The Goose is Already Pretty Damn Fat

there's some christmas song that talks about the goose getting fat.
i just don't recall which one.
but that's something.

this weekend, there was lots more drinking and holiday parties to be had. i did manage to get a bit sick on friday night, due to a combo of cold medicine, lack of food and general stupidity. you'd think i'd learn at some point but i don't.
what can you do.

here's just a whole bunch of random shit.
This is me at Santas last weekend after a few too many cocktails

and for more Santa photos, check out Santarchy and scroll down to the San Francisco section.
Lots of great photos!
childlike punk by good writer Tamara Palmer
sidenote, two of the band members are the young suns of Jonah Sharp, man behind Spacetime Continuum and various electronic shenanigans.
Muzzle Tov
This is so weird.
And so awesome. Be sure to check out the Slide show!
A dog's 'Bark Mitzvah!'
How could Christmas be complete without a thought-provoking rendition of "The Little Drummer Boy" sung ever so, uh, suavely by Marlene Deitrich, in German no less.
Pa Rum Pa Pum Pum
Audiophiles and/or Burning Man fanatics will go ga-ga for all this aural madness.
Sounds Of Burning Man
i haven't checked 'em out but they sound nifty, so i'm sure i'll be delving deep.
more Audiophile awareness here.
i don't really know what the hell this is, but what the hell.
A Singular Christmas
I think they combined various Christmas songs together.
it's very strange.
here's a great way to kill some time at work.
like you were really going to be working.
Pull Bush's Nose
it's strangely addictive.
oh and you should check this out. a good way to avoid shitty conservative corporations.
evil evil evil
Shop wisely!
muzzle Tov to one and all!

Monday, December 13, 2004

Who Took the Merry Out of Christmas?

First, i'd like to give a special thanks to the people in the back, who made all of this happen.
Cuz, you know what, it's time to give credit where credit is due.

it's all about the magical world of Disney and the wonderful elves, who almost never complain or do anything that would get them kicked out on their ass in the middle of a freezing-ass cold North Pole hideaway. Damn, ungrateful elves.

you don't see me complaining.

you read me complaining.

it's different.

don't you know.

also, Santa Claus is supposedly comin' to town (not coming to town, which is different), but i can't substantiate that rumor to be fact as of yet.

this weekend was important for it showed me many things.

1. drunken coworkers are funny but not as fun AND funny as coworkers who i call friends. it's a clear difference, you see.
it's a fact.

2. Going to a time management class is a good thing for me. Sure i'm as gung-ho as the next guy who just attended a work-paid self-help seminar to help me get my shit togetha, but damn, it has helped. a bit. baby steps. shit.

3. focusing is good. making a christmas mix requires focus. i've listened to way too much christmas-related music in the last two weeks, playing a mighty large role as to why i haven't been blogging my ass-ass-ass off. so, as you know, these things come in spurts. creativity. life requirements sometimes get in the way. but you know, 'life requirements' fuel a good portion of my creativity. a interesting situation, to be sure.

4. santas and clowns in one night equals a great time. just when i didn't think i had it in me, i raised, and raised, and raised some more to the (somewhat as) mighty Santas in this year's Santa Rampage-Con-Anarchy thing. basically a pub crawl on foot of 100s of already-intoxicated Santas for a day, spreading some good cheer, and a good deal of drunken madness. Perfect for a warm December San Francisco Saturday. Sure, the subversive bent wasn't quite there this year compared to the two years previous, but you know, it was still pretty fucking fun.
And god knows, we all need to get a little bit more than crazy sometimes.
You too?
Here I Am, Not Quite Rocking Like a Hurricane just Yet

General Santarchy Fun

5. Staying with pretty much the same drink all night, even if plenty is quaffed, results in much less pain the next morning.

it's a fact.

so with that, i go back to making my magical, mystical musical journey to Christmas Neverland.

Hurry down the chimney now, children.

Thursday, December 09, 2004

So Long, Dimebag Darrell

This is some crazy shit. An idiot jumps onstage during a metal concert and blows away four people, including DamagePlan guitarist Dimebag Darrell, formerly of the group Pantera.
I wasn't much of a fan of Pantera, or specifically, the lead singer, Phil Anselmo (total asshole) but it's still freakish to me as a music fan and former metalhead, someone who's been to hundreds, if not thousands, of live shows.
Really sad.

Seminal Guitarist, 4 Others Die in Ohio Shooting
Five Killed in Shooting Rampage at Club
Gunman opens fire at heavy metal concert; guitarist among dead
Former Pantera guitarist among 4 killed at club
'Dimebag' Darrell Abbott: A Larger-Than-Life Guitarist And Human Being
Shooter Was Ex-Marine
Pantera News

You know, i�ve often wondered why that doesn�t happen more, some crazy person with a gun taking out the band or something.
Not to say it SHOULD happen, but the idea of thousands of fucked up people being together in one place getting all aggressive and crazy (esp. at a pantera-type show) in a highly chaotic environment makes the likelihood that one could get away with such an act fairly high.
You�re up on stage, standing high above everyone else, could easily make you a target for some nut with a gun. Then, just disappear into the then-panicked crowd.
I do wonder if this will have negative repercussions on bands playing live in theaters and arenas. Or at least give bands pause when playing live.
Oddly enough, i interviewed ol� dimebag darryl back in the mid 90s when he was in Pantera. He seemed kind of gruff, as i recall. In fact, i talked to him on the phone AND met them backstage in Detroit, now that i think about it.
Getting killed for playing music. Fucked up shit.

and on a cheerier note, here's a story that all the good little boys and girls who want a little something extra from Santa this year.
Santa Brings Christmas Pot to Schoolkids

Thursday, December 02, 2004

Shuckle Beef Diaper for Poodles

Thanks for caring.
And enjoy your pestilence.

i have a headache and i need aspirin. or some other drug. pop a pill. that's what life's all about, right?

here's some fun crap for your weary heads.

first, super weird shit.

Poodle Fitness
This might be one of the odder things i've ever seen. and let me tell you, i've seen plenty mister.
chuckles never knew me like you did.

and now, priceless material from yours truly, shit that's been published for people to enjoy the world over. damn, i still have a headache, just one minute later.

Matthew Dear named artist of the year

Swayzak cd Review for the children

and you have a good day ms. smarty pants. i never liked you or your america. shove it and take that job away from you.


it's an important part of this nutritious breakfast. everything we do is music.
haven't you wondered why the Right is so obsessed with gays, gay marriage, sex in general really, and at the same time, displaying this overreaching sense of bravado, overly cocky even, and defensive. Yet, somehow, also, persecuted by the supposedly wimpy democrats. A bit more than contrarian, don't you think?
i mean, damn.
it's so weird. why is there such hostility in the air right now?
we all have to feel it to a certain extent.

i heard it from my friends about the things you said.

these people seem so obsessed with sex, it's downright fucked.
and i say that with the utmost satisfaction.
come on in, the water's fine.
sexual timezone love channel

and just when you thought it was safe for tea at 10.
this comes along.

remember lynn anderson? the country singer?
come on. nobody ever let you listen to lynn anderson?
she is busted. and not in her rose garden.
Singer Lynn Anderson Charged with DWI

ever notice how different states call driving drunk different things?
like here in california, it's DUI, or driving under interference.
whereas, DWI traditionally stands for Dancing While Impish.
which totally sucks, especially if you're Amish and just wanting to get a good night's rest.
how's that for lemonade and socks?

shove my face into a plate of gooey juji fruits.

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

Negativland takes on U2's iPod

This so rocks.
Anyone who remembers when Negativland took on the behemoth band known as U2 will appreciate this, sent to me from a coworker's email list.

>>Just in time for the holiday shopping season, I've opened an eBay auction for the Unauthorized iPod U2 vs. Negativland Special Edition. Commemorating the infamous early-90s case in which U2's record label crushed indie noisemakers Negativland, this iPod is a U2 iPod that comes pre-loaded with lots of Negativland tunes, and some fancy box modifications. Experimental noise content trapped in a corporate megarock shell--oh, the humanity! Profits will go to Downhill Battle, a non-profit organization advocating for a less sucktastic music industry.
Unauthorized iPod U2 vs. Negativland Special Edition

Are you ready to go to the moon?
I sure as fuck am!
How about a robotic village and moon base on the moon? oh yeah.
Lunar Robotic Village, Moon Base Gains International Support

Not really a surprise but still something to give pause.
Bush's goals still big, bold

And it's true, we ARE anti-Family.
down with families!
Incredible shrinking US family

The Case Against Condeleeza

Bill Moyers takes the Condi appointment to task

Monday, November 29, 2004

Hard Work

Big surprise this is. Or not.
Lying Makes Brain Work Harder
Brain Scan Shows Differences in Truth, Lying
Lying is harder than telling the truth because you have to remember what the lie was specifically and to whom, since, you could be telling different lies to different people.
Not that i would know anything about any of this.

i need to come up with three albums that would make good gifts that came out this year.
And quicklike, see?
so i'll be back to post on the travails of thanksgiving weekend momentarily.

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

Insanity Abounds

What the hell is wrong with people?
Mom pleads guilty to locking son in trunk during party

And just when you thought we had more than enough shit to worry about.
Exploding Cell Phones A Growing Problem

Or, you can have elephant seals showing up near your home, like we did.
Seal pup rescued in culvert near Oakland Coliseum


Let's Get Serious ... about some real news

Jermaine Jackson ending marriage
Michael Jackson's brother Jermaine has filed for divorce from his wife of nine years in a Los Angeles court. The former Jackson 5 member is citing irreconcilable differences for his split with wife Alejandra, who is the mother of his two sons, Jaafar and Jermajesty. This was Jackson's second marriage -- he divorced Motown boss Berry Gordy's daughter Hazel in 1988.

what up Jaafar?


And this will make you happy, especially if you flew in June.
I don't think i did.
Airlines Cough Up Passenger Data


more important information about the esteemed Virgin Mary Cheese Sandwich recently sold on eBay.
At casino, sandwich is on a roll


Poor Table Manners Lead to Stabbings
nothing like Thanksgiving for a few stabbing of relatives. don't you love family?


Jump, jump, JUMP! Keep on Truckin'
Man dies in Empire State Building Leap
It's a long way to the bottom if you want to rock 'n' roll.

Monday, November 22, 2004

Hot Words & Terms

  • Black Eye - "The recent basketbrawl in Detroit was a Black eye for the city of Detroit, the Indiana Pacers and humans without legs everywhere."

  • Schadenfreude \SHAHD-n-froy-duh\, noun: A malicious satisfaction in the misfortunes of others, i.e. "Republicans are reveling in their Schadenfreude at the expense of executing 48% of all Americans who don't agree with them."

  • Daschled - A way to describe someone who has lost out because of lack of personality and charisma, even though they may be much more competent than the close-minded Republican asshole who beat him. "Former Senate Minority Leader Tom Daschle was Daschled right out of his Senate Seat by Tom Thune, a total prick who likes to tout bibles."

Sunday, November 21, 2004

I Am the Sum Total of My DNA

My grandfather, Warren, played the tuba in WWII and was in the Army band.
My grandmother said being in the band was the only thing keeping him from going AWOL. Warren fought the Germans in WWII and was even awarded the Bronze Star for Bravery in the line of duty for tying a tourniquet on an officer�s arm/leg (not sure) which is crazy.
crazy because i don't think i even knew that before (just like i didn't know that my grandmother, Warren's wife, played basketball for four years. but that's another story for another day).
Warren was drafted in 1942 and was apparently in the service through 1945. He and my grandmother, who 'courted' for most of those three years while he was gone via letters to each other, were married in 1946 and my Dad was born February 23, 1947. So they didn't waste a whole lot of time.
Also, Gerry was talking about a tank that Warren was supposed to be in normally and had taken off because he had something to do. Well, that tank hit a landmine and blew everyone in it to bits. They had begun to send word home that either he or a fellow soldier in his division was killed when in actuality that was untrue. But due to the nature of the death, it was difficult, obviously to identify the bodies.
But the whole music thing is what�s especially intriguing. That and my grandfather's decision to do something and not get in the tank at that time is the reason i'm fucking here right now saying this. i love the concept of seemingly innocuous decisions ending up having a gigantor effect on your entire life.
But now, i have a clearer understanding of my supposed inborn interest in music, despite the fact that my parents weren't very interested in it. somewhat they were interested because i spent many hours listening to their old 7-inch records when i was a child.
my grandfather, who died in 1978 at age 57, apparently also played the guitar, the trumpet and a few other instruments.
so there's that. neat.
we were talking about all this because my grandmother celebrated her 80th birthday on Saturday, November 20. 80! she's outlived all of her siblings and she had a lot of siblings.

i like it China blue.


Robert Zinsky makes a fucking fine merlot. i recommend. i love wines and their nuances (though i'm still learning about red wines). being a huge fan of beverages, that's not a big surprise. still. it is a mighty thing to have, good beverages. i purchased many beverages today.

including some hella expensive coffee, the jamaican blue. the damn fine good shit.
but way too expensive.


I have four short-sleeved button down orange shirts. What is the meaning of this? Four i tell you, including one to add to the collection via the estate sale at Scout's yesterday. Scout's new house is the shit, the bomb, the bomb chronic, the fucking swiss cheese be-all end-all mutha fucka. and i ain't trippin' at all at that shizen. fu*k. but shit, why do i have so many shirts of the same hue? it must be something that's wrong with me, making me think so foolishly. maybe it's coincidence. or maybe it's the fact that you've been depantsed one too many times.


Leave your indie cred with the attendant.


People should note the similarity in my headline regarding the Detroit Pistons to others used in the mainstream media. They were copying my ass bitches. That was in my previous post, bitches, witches and switches.


Thanksgiving plays a role maybe in my introspection toward family.
No, not really. But I�m always intrigued to hear things about my family and how they have potentially influenced me and my personality.
Thanksgiving has always been, to me, about being together with friends and/or family and therefore, without much religion involved. but now that too is likely to change, in the wake of our so-called christian 'awakening.' retardo. Enrico Palazzo believes these things i say.
Thanksgiving is a time to give thanks, eat food, reminisce about dead people and drink to much liquor. It also means it's time to sit a little longer on the toilet the next day, contemplating America, America the book and America the lean.


I�m competitive and I like swiss cheese.


Last night was a whirlwind of activity.
i gave away a lot of cds. i had hella friends up in that piece. it was righteous yo.
and then there was Mr. Timecop/Cobra complete with the match sticking out of one side of his mouth up yonder and his sunglasses taking his ass home. something about him being a VJ and wanting to know how he could make the transition to that place, the slanted door. interesting indeed.

oh yeah grandma and chicken for supper.
but yeah, three groups of friends for the timmmmmmmmiiiiiii.
and you know i like me some M's.

shit yeah.
molly, ted and teddy's parents all the way from nyc. live love.
the disc golf posse, featuring mr. murphy, mr. poletiek and mr. fisher.
then ms. locklear, mr. fuller and ms. B. all there in the house.
oh! and Amy was there too. she's an ex of a roomie and a really cool girl.
but i also had hella accolades. there was the family very interested in my work. the kids loved it especially. there was the older guy, kind of annoying, who i gave a cd to anyway. what the fuck? there was the woman whose girlfriend was getting hit upon by some drunk fuck wearing a hawaiian shirt and a stupid hat (that same annoying fuck later came up to me and told me i look like elton john, but 'from like 30 years ago.' thank god for small miracles), who i gave a cd to as a way for her to feel better, as she seemed to be unloading on me (what is it about my face that says "please tell me the most personal details of your life even though i don't know you at all"?) about the fact her girlfriend was getting hit upon. it was only when said girlfriend showed up that i realized the women were a couple.
but yeah, gave away all my cds. all of the. kind of a magical night. i shot my load, for sure, and played up the damn good tunes for all to hear, enjoy and piffle with.

punched out the good shit. played it up. hammed it up. i lived the life. i'm already halfway there.
maybe i should write myself a check a la jim carrey, no?


There was the scotch party at peter's too. excellent scotch. too early of an evening though. i wanted to see ellen allien. i was enjoying the liquor a mite much though. so it's a good thing i'm alive and ready for the world.


Less is more.
We gotta gets to Barcelona. we are going to barcelona. i say it here, i say it loud, i say it proud.
i am going to barcelona.
leaving the country.


DPG in the place to be. DPG may not be a match for King Kitty though.
don't be an enigma.
What time to I go to work Monday morning. Is early.
Remember the night i stayed in the car in Tim Danowski's driveway while he got into a fight with some kids and I stayed in the car while some idiot dude punched his fists against my driver's side window in my 1972 Volvo? Remember that?
ah, the ol' cheesebox, as it was called by some.
it was a good first car. in retrospect only, of course.

Everything is beautiful in its own fey way.

FFF is coming back.
1. high fives.
2. green day.
3. barcelona anticipation
4. hello it's me and other fine hits
5. fans
6. decapitation
7. emancipation
8. escalation
9. indignation
10. contemplation

Christmas is coming, the goose is getting fat.
Over the river and through the woods, to grandmother's house we go.

let's get some numbers, shall we?
burn baby burn.

i'm glad i don't live in haiti anymore.
not that i ever did.
but still.

chocolate rhythm(s).

Saturday, November 20, 2004

Yet Another Black Eye for Detroit

I'm not as much of a sports fan as i once was, though it'll always be in my blood.
so when i saw the shocking footage from the Detroit Pistons-Indiana Pacers game Friday night in Detroit, my jaw fell to the floor -- and then some.
holy shit, a full-scale fight that began on the court and turned very ugly when an idiot fan threw a beer and possibly soda on Pacer Ron Artest while he laid atop the scorer's table.
Artest leaped into the stands and attempted to fight the guy who threw the cup (too bad he got the wrong guy). there's just no excuse for this to have escalated like it did.
i think the players and the fans are equally at fault in this.
i'm embarassed as a Detroit fan and as a somewhat proud (and former) Michigander.
i still represent for Detroit. But as ESPN just said, this was a line that was crossed, crossed and crossed again. Fucking pathetic on all sides. i'm glad the pistons players didn't seem to be involved in most of the melee. but shit Pacer Artest cold-cocked a couple random fans on the court. it was crazy, to say the least.

but what the fuck, it was a total disgrace. fans dumping shit all over the players? i hated plenty of players but it was in the vein of the game. i never ever thought of taking it beyond that. it's a fucking game. a GAME. it means nothing. really.

it's so weird because i'm so not an avid sports fan like i once was but this thing is just mindblowing.
here's a few stories, though you gotta see the video to appreciate this.
A new low: Only solution for NBA is to get rid of the guy who's the problem

Ugly brawl taints Pistons' loss in Central showdown

Plenty of blame to go around


Fists, objects fly near end of Pacers-Pistons

and in completely unrelated news, i found this to be quite interesting.
so yeah.
note the condescending tone of this headline in CNN about the election.
yeah, liberal media. oh yeah.

Friday, November 19, 2004

Video Vendetta & Picture Pages

Here's a couple great videos to check out for your life.
First, a very drunk Anna Nicole Smith at the American Music Awards the other night.

Like My Body?

And then there's little Timmy and his wish that mommy and daddy were dead. I think all kids at some point wish their parents were dead. not that you really actually wish they were dead. but you say dumb things
Timmy's Wish

Here's further evidence the red state people truly are smarter than us fools in the blue states.

More photos you can shake a stick at. And i like to shake sticks.

Don't forget to check out the Air Guitar World Championships! oooooh yeah!
Shred your Shit

Interview with Frank Black of the Pixies

Raw! Uncut Q&A with Charles Thompson, the man, they myth, the legend and the ghost leader of the Pixies.
It's true, people, i just did a story for the Detroit Free Press on the Pixies.
And damn, it was good.
So sayeth me.
and so sayeth my flock of geese.
Here's the final version of the story that ran:

Wave Of Admiration: More than a decade after breaking up, alternative rock icons The Pixies reunite for a run of sold-out shows

and the corresponding sidebar:
Lost in the Lyrics

very exciting, huh? too bad none of the photos run on the website.

yeah, yeah, and yeah.
dammit jim, i'm a doctor not a fornicater.

or something like that.

ok, well, now that we have your attention.
here's the full unexpurgated, unmitigated, most high, Q&A with mr. Thompson. uncut!
unwatched! unwashed! unmussed!




FB: Sorry for the wait. I went a little over talking to my girlfriend.

The one I just read about in yesterday's Salon story?

FB: In what?

Did you see that?

FB: No.

Did you do an interview with Salon recently? (long pause) You probably
don't remember. Basically, you were railing about Spin magazine and

FB: Oh, was I whining about Spin magazine?


FB: Ok.

I didn't say whining. It was kinda funny, actually. Anyway� So, how
are things going?

FB: Fine.

Where are you calling from?

FB: Phoenix.

Ah. I saw you guys, I caught the show in Berkeley and I also saw the
Coachella show. I first actually saw you open for U2 back in '91 on
the 'Achtung Baby' tour. My first question is, what would be the
difference between seeing the Pixies back in 1991 and today?

FB: (long pause) Well, we were a lot grouchier in 1991. I guess that
would be the main difference.

You weren't talking to each other then?

FB: Not a lot (chuckles).

What inspired you to get back together after so long?

FB: Say again.

What instigated, what made you decide to get back together?

FB: Oh, I don't know. A whole bunch of circumstances, you know what I
mean? Unforeseen circumstances. Unplanned, spontaneous, you know? Not
any one reason or factor.

Back when the band ended, did you end it, was it you that spurred it
or was it more of a mutual thing? There was always rumors about that
you ---

FB: I don't know how they found out but i did send a fax to our manager's office and quit the band, essentially breaking them up.

so would it be fair to say it was your call to get back together?

FB: Was it my call? Well, yeah, sure. i mean, initially i suppose, ultimately it was everybody's call. If someone wouldn't have wanted to do it, it probably wouldn't have happened.

When you decided to get back together and go out on the road, were you surprised at the level of adulation you received? Or was it something you kind of suspected would happen?

FB: I suppose it was more along the lines of something i would expect.

Cuz you've been performing with the Catholics.

FB: Different bands. Whole other vibe. What does that have to do with it?

Just the differences in playing to a huge crowd on a giant stage say like Coachella. Do you feel more comfortable on stage now? You seemed a lot looser.

FB: Who?

From Coachella compared to Berkeley.

FB: That's a natural consequence of touring. i think if you go see any band at the beginning of a tour and go see them again six weeks later, you're gonna see a slightly different band.

Are you guys pretty loose as far as planning your sets? Because the show i saw at Berkeley it seemed like you guys didn't make a set list. Is that something you do a lot?

FB: Sometimes we don't do one. Frequently, I deviate from the set list. Not really a big deal, you know.

A lot of bands on the so-called comeback trail are often derided by people who say "They're only doing it for the money." Would you say that played a role at all in coming back?

FB: Oh, but of course. If there was no demand for us to go play out again, I don't know if we would have. We might have, simply for old time's sake. Something for artistic ambition or whatever. You know, that was not going to be the first order of business if we did get back together. Obviously, there was so much demand.

Why do you think there is so much demand for the Pixies? Why now? Do you happen to think this was the perfect time or it just happened to all fall in to place?

FB: There has been a perfect time for us about every few years. It kind of goes up and down, i think. And this year happened to be one that was up times.

It seemed, at Coachella at least, that most people were there to see you guys.

FB: Yeah, I mean.

That has to be gratifying, it has to feel really good.

FB: Sure. It is gratifying.

Do you feel any more motivated to possibly do something in the future with these guys or are you keeping it open-ended at this point? As far as like, are you going to write music, how long you gonna tour, because it seems like you've been touring for the majority of the year.

FB: Well, that was sort of the plan. You only get to do the reunion tour once.

Well, for some bands.

FB: No, but i mean realistically, i mean, as far as the audience is concerned, you only get to do that reunion tour once in terms of the interest or buzz you create. We'll go out...if we go out next year, there may be just as much interest even or more interest in us, i don't know. But it's got nothing to do with how many people show up. The bottom line is it won't be a reunion tour anymore. That will be gone. Just like you can only be a naive beginner band one time. You know, that first couple of years of your existence, and then after that, it kind of goes away. Put out a couple records, do a couple tours and you start to have some experience under your belt and you're not that naive first-timer anymore. So in terms of like, you know, does the fact that we're popular right now in our reunion tour make it more likely we'll go and record again? I don't know. It probably more than anything will make it more likely we'll play more concerts but i don't think we're really that, i don't think that we're that kind of band. I don't think we would mint a record simply because we might make some money on it. That wouldn't be a reason to make a record, that would be the wrong reason, that wouldn't fit. You really need to have some firm aesthetic reasons for making a record. Because you want it to be good. The fact that you're going to make some money off of it maybe is sort of icing on the cake or par for the course. Whatever. That will happen the way that it happens, either it'll be a big failure, a big success or something in the middle, whatever. It will do whatever it's going to do, but to go out and make a record simply because you're selling a lot of concert tickets is, you know, it isn't that kosher.

Do you find that now are you reinterpreting any of your older songs differently compared with the way you recorded it?

FB: Not really, no. We're playing them probably the same way that we've always played them. Maybe a little more muscle. We all have a little more muscle than we used to. I'm probably literally speaking, you know, just because we're older and we're not 80 years old, and therefore have less muscle. We actually all i think literally, everyone in the band is literally more muscular. Because we're in our late 30s and early 40s, as opposed to early 20s, so there isn't that, physiologically we're at that stage in life where, yeah sure, we may be balder and fatter but everyone's also more buff.

You could take each other out if you need to.

FB: Yeah.

Now you released that one song 'Bam Thwok' and released that on iTunes. Is that even a possibility at least, of releasing individual songs, even if you don't record an album?

FB: It's an option, sure, or recording EPs and selling them at your gigs, or whatever. There's definitely more than one way to release a song, i suppose.

What do you think about that? Obviously a lot has changed in the music industry since the Pixies were around the first time with iTunes and downloading. Some people are opposed the concept of downloading songs instead of albums. What do you think of all that digital media and downloading as a band. Or even as yourself.

FB: I don't know what i think about it. I guess it's an interesting enough topic just to talk about but i don't really have a strong opinion about it one way or the other. I mean, it is what it is. That's just the way technology and cultural habits change. They just do. They always do. It's always changing. Fifteen or 20 years from now there will probably be another, at least slightly different scenario, so i'm not for or against anything in particular. It is what it is, so the question is how do you fit in. How do you use it to your advantage as a person who makes a living as a musician or a songwriter.

I know at least some of your shows there are CDs being sold almost immediately, as a recording of that show. Have you been doing that?

FB: Yeah, we did that for quite a few shows. Well, we didn't do it but this company we're working with did it.

It seems like a possible way to thwart people who are trying to bootleg you or anything else. I don't even know if you worry about that.

FB: I suppose, yeah. No, not really. Bootlegs, especially for a fringe band is not really a negative thing. It may be a negative thing for Bruce Springsteen or something like that or U2, who's immensely popular. Theoretically they're losing a lot of revenue because a bootleg is created of a U2 concert and it's sold to tens of thousands of people or something like that. And so you can say, "Oh gee wow, there's all this income being generated and it's being sold as official product maybe in all these record stores, whatever." From a business point of view, that could be a concern for an artist like that but fringe artists who aren't necessarily selling millions and millions of records all bootlegs indicate is that you have some street credibility. And it's not really the number of bootlegs that are being manufactured and sold, even the ones that are really being sold illegally really blatantly is not enough, it isn't worth it to go after these people. They're just not generating enough revenue to make it worthwhile. So you just kind of go 'oh well, what are you gonna do? I guess people like me. Hopefully they'll go out and buy the real record, which is what i think most people do. Who goes out and buys bootlegs, you know what i mean? They sound like shit.

It's not worth the money you spend on bootlegs, usually.

FB: Yeah because with very little effort you can make your own recording of your favorite band just as easy. You hit the right little Walkman and the right little microphones and clip 'em to your glasses.

Do you ever see people trying to record you guys?

FB: Oh, well, what's there to see? Lots of people are doing it. We don't really care if we don't know about it, we don't care. We don't like people taping microphones to the wall and making a big deal out of it. But as long as they keep it to themselves, i don't care.

All your albums, the Pixies albums i'm referring to, throughout the 1990s would you say they continued to sell throughout?

FB: Yeah, they've always sold. Some seasons they sell a lot and some seasons they sell hardly at all. There's not really any sort of...i can't really give you any explanation as to why.

I'm saying that given the context, that the albums are still selling, there's still a market for the Pixies. People are still really into us.

FB: Yeah, you know, the records are still in print and they're available and they always have been. I don't know if they're in like every record store.

Well, there was the "Purple Album" that was released and there was some B-sides and stuff. I noticed more things being released the last few years, it seems like that anyway. Cuz there was a Greatest Hits record that was released not that long ago.

FB: Sure, there's a fair amount of mining going on. What else can we squeeze out of this? I don't think there's anything wrong with that. There's sort of like, it's just being your own archivist you know what i mean? it's just sort of looking at all your tapes and, you know, you get recorded in so many different kinds of situations and people are interested in hearing it, so you kind of go, oh there's this thing that's never been released. Let's put that out. People can say, oh yeah gee, you guys are just really being whores or something like that. But you know, we're not, really. We're just trying to be smart businesspeople, you know? Hey if there's a market for it and there's an interest in it and this is rock music that exists, then what the fuck? Put it out. Who gives a shit? We're not really making a big deal out of it. We're not getting all precious about it with all kinds of over-precious liner notes. We're not real precious about anything. It's not really our attitude.

I think that's why people like you too, though.

FB: Yeah, i think that's definitely part of our appeal is that we're a little bit like everybody else, we're a little bit like the audience on some levels.

I would totally agree. I think people find you guys relatable.

FB: Yeah. We're not pretentious. We may be pretentious with our music, with the songs. I'll be the first one to admit that a lot of my music is kind of arty farty, or whatever, however you want to characterize it. But in terms of our demeanor onstage, like our personalities, we're totally like, what you see is what you get. That's who we are, we're not pretentious in terms of the way we're presenting ourselves to the crowd or whatever, it's like, it's really straight up.

I like the fact that at Coachella, for example, with this gigantic stage, you just go up there and you play your songs. I think i was more stoked about that than anything else that it was just a straightforward Pixies show. It just happened to be at a big venue.

FB: Yeah. Definitely that's our personality but also that's sort of like from where we came from -- 1980s college rock, that's really the vibe for a lot of those bands, i think. We were totally being anti-mainstream, whether you were a punk band or whether you were a jangly guitar band or whether you a synth band, whatever. All of that so-called college rock is very much about just getting up there and doing your songs and not really, not a lot of flash. And i don't think there's anything wrong with flash. I think there are really great theatrical performers that really do a great job and i'm not...i'm not against anything really (chuckles). It's not that i'm against it, it's a free country, a free world, whatever, it's a stage, it's a rock stage. Go up there and do whatever you want to do. See what people think. Hit 'em over the head with a stupid stick or do something smarter, whatever, the choice is yours. Who's to say that you're right or wrong, everyone has their own opinion, but definitely we are not the kind of band who like to kick the beach-ball out into the crowd and go 'heeey-yo, heeey-yo" and there seems to be a lot of that these days, especially in the festivals. A lot of the younger crowd in the festivals kind of sometimes have been looking at the Pixies this year like 'So when are they going to start kicking the beachball out here? Why are they just standing there?" They don't really get it. Whereas in 1989 i don't think the audiences at a lot of these festivals in Europe, they never would have questioned that. They just would have been like, "oh yeah, cool."

It seems like your crowd, at least from the two shows i saw on this tour, that you had the older thirtysomethings -- i'd be in that group -- that remember you from the first time around, so it's super-exciting for us, and then you had a lot of the younger crowd too. Is it a strange dichotomy at all? Because obviously there are people that are expecting a little more theatrics, a little more livelihood, a lot of it on the stage and--

FB: Not to be totally crass but at the end of the day, as long as people pay their money to get into the door, i don't care if they're little old ladies. It doesn't bother me. You know, i'm glad that they're there and i'm going to try really hard to do my thing and hopefully everybody will get their money's worth and that's sort of my attitude, so i'm not really freaked out or weirded out by a young audience versus an older audience or whatever, whatever. It's not really anything i can control and i just have to deal with it the best that i can. It's fine. It's more challenging. There's a lot more girls in the crowd now than there used to be. And there's a lot of young people who aren't riding the wave of Pixies popularity because that already happened in 1988 or whatever. This is a, there's no wave going on right now. Sure, there's lots of people buying tickets to our show and everything and that's great, but it's not the same thing as when a band is first starting out, they're right out of the gates and the word-of-mouth kinda thing happens and everyone's excited -- and there's a lot of boys, generally. They're really raising their fists in the air and singing along, it's a different kind of thing. People now are a bit lame and the younger crowd are way more curious, they're just standing there taking it in. They're not really ... freaked out because their favorite band came to town. They're kinda like "Ohhh, so this is who they are, this is what all the hoopla's about."

Oh, i think that's because there's so many bands that have cited you now as being an influence, for better or for worse. That plays a role for sure cuz i can't count how many bands i've read that here and there, where it's just like "oh, the Pixies..." -- how much time do we have left?

FB: I don't know, i suppose i should think about calling my next interview.

Well, it was great talking to you. I actually have also seen you play with Frank Black & the Catholics too. Are you still going to be performing with that band too.

FB: I don't know, actually. We're on sabbatical as well, so... the last time i took a sabbatical with a band it ended up being 11 or 12 years, so we'll see what happens. Right now i'm totally focused on playing with the Pixies and enjoying it as they are.

It was great talking to you. I've enjoyed seeing you and your bands in various incarnations over the years.

FB: Yeah, thank you very much. It's good to talk to you. Take care.


Thursday, November 18, 2004


president of the philippines was here today.


how's your stool sample sara sample?

-7 disc golf was my new record the other day.
-1 today
addiction is a fey.


living the life of a sailor.
sailors stink of seaweed and sucklehoney sandwiches, for pleases, me cheeses, sneezes, fo schneeeeeesays.

write about your life.


rescue 666

kevin kackles for kundrums.

shaftherd never heard your word for turd nerds. werd.

clack goes the american worker.
calunk goes the majorette.
cachin-siltania goes the pad ped disher.
chunnel love is your marionette.

everything is beautiful in its own pain.


so sayeth the flock.
cockknocker for soccer snatchers looking for purse pfizers for kicks, tricks, licks, hicks, sickshit mix whips for schlipschness, infinitesimal for shizzle nizzle fizzle de whistle stop caravan mother country fuzzy wuzzy cuzzy nazzletooth perhaps too fruit-tee for me you see hee hee tee tea for seafarwaring daring caring malarian stricken kittens for shitzens in my kitchen, for bitchin camaro don't you diss me marcello. from urugay. don't you pay my way, bay-bay.


(this messages was delivered to you straight from Geraldine Ferraro's widow)

sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy.

i love everyone named john denver.
thanks america.
and especially, to Red China, without with, none of would be possible to speak of.
except for the salad dressing.
red china has shitty salad dressing.
you wouldn't believe it.
but, it's true i tell you this.
damn and
if you mean to talk privately, consult your furniture salesperson for further assistance.
no additional tank dressings will be required of you m'lady.

fuzz you and your situational comedy hack loving brother in law fuckstains who prey on children purely for cash, profit and american self-worth.
i'm glad we've worked everything out together.

eat more soup.

I am Brie as You Are He and We Are All Together

Take this Cheese Test and you'll learn much about yourself. this is what it said about my wonderful being:
"You are a cheese with a complex flavor. Your moods are affected by your current environments. You are sophisticated and mature but sometimes a little superstitious."

better than a horoscope, that's for sure.

ok, this is a bit scary. A reporter has been jailed for refusing to reveal his source of a video showing a city official accepting a bribe from an undercover FBI agent.
Reporter convicted of contempt

Reporter Is Convicted in R.I. for Protecting Source

Wednesday, November 17, 2004

on fire

jon stewart is just that tonight, fucking hilarious and ruthlessly funny.
the kind of funny i fucking dig mother fuckers.
and also.

chocolate thunder is your friend.
what's the matter with kansas?
being discussed by jon stewart and thomas frank, author of aforementioned book regarding the plain state.
i fucking hate the red states.
fuck you.
fuck your elementary soup nazis.
this guy the author is a douche.
what the hell. he is from kansas. stinkeyes for free.

i'm so syrupy sometimes. charlotte sometimes too, if i were robert smith.
fuck morality.
the moral minority can go be moral by themselves.
frank the cat is getting on my back.
this is a strange phenomenon, frank just said about people who vote in nebraska and kansas, and ensuing red states. the frank capra-esque ideals of America, their victimization, complain constantly that they're victims.
the baby boomers are all to fault, i think.
attempting to create a world that never really was, an ideal world where morality ruled and that was the only way to keep people in line, to create order.
however, order is actually created by suppression, according to Republicans.
chocolate thunder still rules. unless you're no longer dead.

be careful, i have staples.
apparently, the fucking parisitic christian right are even anti that new Kinsey film starring liam neeson, because of all the 'inaccurate' portrayals of sex and his far-reaching, insanely influential sex studies in the 1940s and 50s. can you guess also controversial?

these right-sucking republican cowards just need to latch onto something at every turn, playing on fear, ignorance and complete blind faith.
i will cheer at your ginormous demise.

also, tom delay goes to hell automatically.
and, fuck you michael powell, you inept bible-thumping cockroach.
stab out all of our eyes please, because you're the real ruler.

tom deLay is a stink-ass.

dead skunk in the middle of the road.
it's a good thing i'm making sense.
these republicans are going to take our entire country down.

again, i say, republicans, you are the enemy.
you are evil.
vile you are.

go away

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

Letters to the Big Bad Bush

More hilarity from the peanut gallery. Even though i hate the peanut gallery. What exactly is a peanut gallery anyway? it's bullshit i tell you.
why can't your head be straighter?


here's the first, better than the first:

    Dear President Bush,

    Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from you and understand why you would propose and support a constitutional amendment banning same sex marriage. As you said "in the eyes of God marriage is based between a man a woman." I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. . . End
    of debate.

    I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to follow them.

    1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

    2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

    3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanness - Lev. 15:19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

    4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev. 1:9. The problem is, my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

    5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

    6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle
    this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?

    7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may! not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

    8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

    9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

    10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together
    to stone them? Lev. 24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20: 14)

    I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I am confident you can help.

    Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.


Delicious, isn't it? no? no. make my temple part of your familial circus of destruction.
man, this song i'm listening to right now really fucking sucks. who is it?
The Pastels, oh wait, Bill Wells' remix. Fuck Bill Wells. Even if he isn't dead yet.

here's the next letter, the concession speech Kerry WANTED to deliver. But being a guy who thinks he has a decent shot at running for president again (and why not?), he decided to go with something a bit more conciliatory. yeah thumpkin, yeah!

here we go bitches of wealth. deliver me from whence thyne didst come, puto:
[Former candidate, flanked by his family and supporters, steps up to the podium in the bright autumn sunlight. Cheers and applause are heard.]

My fellow Americans, the people of this nation have spoken, and spoken with a clear voice. So I am here to offer my concession. [Boos, groans, rending of garments]

I concede that I overestimated the intelligence of the American people. Though the people disagree with the President on almost every issue, you saw fit to vote for him. I never saw that coming. That's really special. And I mean "special" in the sense that we use it to describe those kids who ride the short school bus and find ways to injure themselves while eating pudding with rubber spoons. That kind of special.

I concede that I misjudged the power of hate. That's pretty powerful stuff, and I didn't see it. So let me take a moment to congratulate the President's strategists: Putting the gay marriage amendments on the ballot in various swing states like Ohio... well, that was just genius. Genius. It got people, a certain kind of people, to the polls. The unprecedented number of folks who showed up and cited "moral values" as their biggest issue, those people changed history. The folks who consider same sex marriage a more important issue than war, or terrorism, or the economy... Who'd have thought the election would belong to them? Well, Karl Rove did. Gotta give it up to him for that. [Boos.] Now, now. Credit where it's due.

I concede that I put too much faith in America's youth. With 8 out of 10 of you opposing the President, with your friends and classmates dying daily in a war you disapprove of, with your future being mortgaged to pay for rich old peoples' tax breaks, you somehow managed to sit on your asses and watch the Cartoon Network while aging homophobic hillbillies carried the day. You voted with the exact same anemic percentage that you did in 2000. You suck. Seriously, y'do. [Cheers, applause] Thank you. Thank you very much.

There are some who would say that I sound bitter, that now is the time for healing, to bring the nation together. Let me tell you a little story. Last night, I watched the returns come in with some friends here in Los Angeles. As the night progressed, people began to talk half-seriously about secession, a red state / blue state split. The reasoning was this: We in blue states produce the vast majority of the wealth in this country and pay the most taxes, and you in the red states receive the majority of the money from those taxes while complaining about 'em. We in the blue states are the only ones who've been attacked by foreign terrorists, yet you in the red states are gung ho to fight a war in our name. We in the blue states produce the entertainment that you consume so greedily each day, while you in the red states show open disdain for us and our values. Blue state civilians are the actual victims and targets of the war on terror, while red state civilians are the ones standing behind us and yelling "Oh, yeah!? Bring it on!"

More than 40% of you Bush voters still believe that Saddam Hussein had something to do with 9/11. I'm impressed by that, truly I am. Your sons and daughters who might die in this war know it's not true, the people in the urban centers where al Qaeda wants to attack know it's not true, but those of you who are at practically no risk believe this easy lie because you can. As part of my concession speech, let me say that I really envy that luxury. I concede that.

Healing? We, the people at risk from terrorists, the people who subsidize you, the people who speak in glowing and respectful terms about the heartland of America while that heartland insults and excoriates us... we wanted some healing. We spoke loud and clear. And you refused to give it to us, largely because of your high moral values. You knew better: America doesn't need its allies, doesn't need to share the burden, doesn't need to unite the world, doesn't need to provide for its future. Hell no. Not when it's got a human shield of pointy-headed, atheistic, unconfrontational breadwinners who are willing to pay the bills and play nice in the vain hope of winning a vote that we can never have. Because we're "morally inferior," I suppose, we are supposed to respect your values while you insult ours. And the big joke here is that for 20 years, we've done just that.

It's not a "ha-ha" funny joke, I realize, but it's a joke all the same.

Being a political addict gives me one luxury - as well as conceding the election today, I am also announcing my candidacy for President in 2008. [Wild applause, screams, chants of "JFK! JFK!"] Thank you.

And I make this pledge to you today: THIS time, next time, there will be no pandering. This time I will run with all the open and joking contempt for my opponents that our President demonstrated towards the cradle of liberty, the Ivy League intellectuals, the "media elite," and the "white-wine sippers." This time I will not pretend that the simple folk of America know just as much as the people who devote their lives to serving and studying the nation and the world. They don't.

So that's why I'm asking for your vote in 2008, America. I'm talking to you, you ignorant, slack-jawed yokels, you bible-thumping, inbred drones, you redneck, racist, homophobic chest-thumping, perennially duped grade-school grads. Vote for me, because I know better, and I truly believe that I can help your smug, sorry asses. Vote for me in '08! Thank you, and may God, if he does in fact exist, bless each and every one of you.

[Tumultuous cheers, applause, and foot-stomping. PULL BACK to reveal the rest of the stage, the row of cameras, hundreds of unoccupied chairs, and the empty field beyond.]

Monday, November 15, 2004

The Real Fallujah
What the media isn't showing you

All the media can do is talk up our success there. Never mind all the people we're killing, or our soldiers that are dying.
And for what???

Take a look at what war REALLY looks like.
These are horrific photos, be warned.

Fallujah In Pictures

Or here's some raw footage from some soldiers in Fallujah.
No blood and guts but still, frightening nonetheless.
Fallujah Video

oh, this is something really important.
Let's send Secret Service agents to a fucking high school because they were planning to perform Bob Dylan's anti-war song "Masters of War" and hysterical parents thought they were talking about Bush.
High School Talent Show Turns Political

Fucking stupid Republicans. Fucking stupid.

But then, that is nothing compared to the jaw-dropping shooting of a defenseless Iraqi by an American soldier. I just caught the video on CNN and it made me sick.
Military investigates shooting of wounded insurgent
U.S. Military Probes Shooting of Iraqi in Falluja
So this is what we're at war for? to kill random people at will?
Apparently, yes. All i can say is we're all going to pay for these ruthless disgusting killings of thousands of innocent people so Bush can push his stumbling bravado upon the rest of the world. Again i ask, what the hell is this war for?

And then there's these dumb hick soldiers on TV expressing their amazement at Arabs as young as what he described as 13 or 14-year-old kids attempting to fight the Americans. "Why would they even try to fight us?" he asked. Uh, because you're in THEIR FUCKING COUNTRY! Gee, i thought the Americans were there to "restore peace." Oh yeah, that's right, we kill 13 and 14-year-olds (obviously we do, because the soldiers couldn't believe kids this young were fighting them) in the name of democracy and to 'help' them.

How can we advocate all this senseless killing? And we're supposed to support the troops? i realize that these troops were sent in because of decisions made by politicians, but seeing video like the stuff i posted above, as well as this impending investigation with the soldier who killed the defenseless insurgent, makes me shudder with disgust and fear for our country and what we've wrought.
unfortunately, i do believe we will all reap what this country has sown.

meanwhile, we have the CIA falling apart too and much of Bush's cabinet heading for the exits ...ah what fun the next four years is going to be...

feeling good yet?

Thursday, November 11, 2004

Dead Calm

I was thinking, on the drive home this evening...actually, i think i've been thinking of this for the last couple days...I've been pretty angry lately.

It has crossed over into my day-to-day life a bit...of course, that's too be expected, what with the state of our country right know.

i love me the ellipse.

and i have to state for the record, that as of right now, hilariously, i'm on my laptop at the Mission Bar in SF using some local network that's free. so i'm online here and rocking my laptop in the one plug (that sort of crackled when i plugged it in -- let's hope i don't blow any fuses) that i found in the back.
i got my anchor steam.

and george michael's "i want your sex" is playing on the jukebox.

life isn't all that bad.

and you know, oddly enough, listening to this show on NPR on the drive Home...and there's tina on the phone.

i guess i'll have to do more of this later...

Later - 9:29 a.m., the next day

as i was saying last night before digressing quite a bit (i was excited about the free network, yo!), i realize i've been angry of late.
And i've come to the conclusion that i can't keep being angry forever. i know this.

sure, the blog is used as a way for me to vent and let off some steam, but i can tell i've been extremely edgy lately, even for me. and god knows, i can get emotional.
but life's too short...better to be proactive.

this isn't to say i'm still not angry and upset about the re-election of George W. Bush, nor does it discount my disappointment with the more than 59 million people who voted for the prick.

But yeah, time to focus and figure out what we have to do to beat them, as well as holding their feet to the fire (see how corporate i've become? i'm using lame corporate analogies to make my point. put me in front of a firing squad pronto) when they fuck up, which will be often.

so yeah, here i am. back in black.
or today, i'm beige.
with elements of green, red and black.
sucka MCs and shit.

Let the happiness commence.
Until i get angry again...hee hee hee.

chuckles the clown is dead.
long live chuckles.

Got the Blahs

Ugh. I got me the blahs today. I'm feeling kind of glum, not very fun or funny, for that matter. Just whatever. Rain doesn't really help in that regard. Plus it's November. Maybe it's my personal body clock or something. Hmmm, who does know.
And I'm muddy right now.
And I just had a crappy-as-fuck (CAP) lunch of florentine chicken. Crapper. I really hate onions. The chicken here is so gristly. i think i have to truly give up on eating meat here at work, unless it's cold cuts.

so there.

However, i did feel somewhat heartened by the words of Frank Rich, one of my favorite columnists of late.
Here's his latest (sign-up/subscription required):
On 'Moral Values,' It's Blue in a Landslide

Go on with your bad selves.
hell, even my iTunes Shuffler is feeling my blueness.
I'm listening to The Smiths' "Unhappy Birthday"...but with Morrissey, i can revel in sadness.
so that's something.

Wednesday, November 10, 2004


Nice to have you back. Good to be here.
Thanks for having me.

So, um, PastTim just sincerely freaked out PresentTim, or, from PastTim's perspective, FutureTim, but that's neither here nor there, or when.


No, really, check this shit out i wrote Wednesday, October 29, 2003, filing said thing about which you will read at 10:59 p.m.

here 'tis:
    "you know, george bush could pull a makaveli (because i can't spell the old school way and i'm too damn lazy to look up the correct one) and have us vote for his pseudo-dead ass because we all feel bad, and then he turns out to be ok.

    like the day after the election, he emerges totally via the strength of knowing a solid 51% of the electorate are behind him (of course, rigged by those touch screens that are heavily funded by GOP monsters - but that's for another day, another struggle in this thing we call life man, fucking a)."

(edited for television)

yessir, i, tim pratt, me, yessir, predicted the damn election.
i should be invited to a think tank right about now.
how DOES one score a think take job, anyway?

damn i need some popcorn. i'm addicted to popcorn of late. of course, i get it for free from a little white ghost who visits me from time to time. haven't seen the tyke in a little while now. but you know, those damn ghosts, always on a different time schedule and dimension than you. never can predict 'em, damn right.

but so anyway...that's pretty rad, i thought. kind of weird. of course, the running polls at the time could have said that and i subconsciously remembered it at that particular moment, right around the same time of night i'm writing this here thingie i'm right here writing right about now.
shazam! i always hated shazam! any superhero that demands you put an exclamation point at the end of his name just sucks.

it's bullshit.

fucking bullshit.

The Kitty is fast asleep right now. She's very tired. She's had a very rough day of being tired.
It's very difficult, being The.

Speaking of, i caught this poet named Cat last night at this spoken word deal at Cafe Royale, a place i had never been before, near Post and Leavenworth. and no, i don't feel like linking the damn thing right now. get your own google search on bitches. so yeah, this girl Cat, she was totally full of herself, but...that's ok. why not? who else will be? she totally surprised me though. i kind of dismissed her as the 'i'm so hip being a spoken word poet and snapping my fingers as a salute to some good 'spittin' rolling forth' type, ya see, but she totally woke my shit up with this harsh anti-republican, anti pro-life crapper type shit, and speaking about her parents in Missouri and such. it just, woke me up.

a bit. we were there to check out Emmanual Ortiz, Tina's activist cousin from Minneapolis who threw down this highly impressive piece about his anger toward the war in Iraq, and oppression of peoples from all over the world. 'A Moment of Silence' is what i would guess it was called.
Fucking intense. i must admit. very good.
he travels out here to SF from time to time to do these types of events. this was the first time Tina and i were able to make it out to one of his shows. which was totaly rad.
and it was doing something different from my normal routine.
which, isn't very normal, i would hazard to guess (as my dad would say, hee - i got pride, yo...respek, west side).


yeah, i'm white sometimes.
but i'm so hip-hop. shit.

you know.

well, yeah, this was good. i don't know what this was.

a spurt. maybe i was spittin'
definitely with the possessive apostrophe, yo.

keep it up

Apostle Pratt Pierre

so sayeth the shepherd, so sayeth the flock...mocka locka cracka lacka macka sacka nacka facka wacka zacka


Christianity = Bigotry?

Of course, i'm very excited about John Ashcroft stepping down. But that excitement will undoubtedly prove to be shortlived as a host of new screaming meanies will soon take their place amongst the Bush Cabinet.
Can't wait for that either.
More hateful 'Christians' addressing such important issues as gay marriage and the downfall of society because of it.
Yeah, gay marriage and abortion, those are real issues, huh? If both of those things continue to run rampant in America, we might as well burn the whole place down. Never mind poverty, the 'war' in Iraq, the environment or other inconsequential issues - who cares about future generations and whether they live or die, as long as we outlaw the gays, then everything will just be alright.
For more impressive anguish, check out Michael Feingold's cover story in this week's Village Voice:

Our Vanished Values:
Where They Went, and Why -- And How They Might Come Back

Here's some key quotes:
    This is the election in which American Christianity destroyed itself. Today the church is no longer a religion but a tacky political lobby, with an obsessive concentration on a minuscule number of social topics so irrelevant to questions of governance that they barely constitute political issues at all. These are the points of contention tied into what are blurrily referred to as "moral values," though they have almost nothing to do with the larger moral question of how one lives one's life, and everything to do with the fundamentally un-Christian and un-American idea of forcing others to live the way you believe they should. The displacement of faith involved is eerie, almost psychotic: Here are people willing to vote against their own well-being and their own children's future, just so they can compel someone else's daughter to bear an unwanted child and deprive someone else's son of the right to file a joint income tax return with his male partner.

    Today the Republican Party is not the right wing of anything; it is a band of violent radical reactionaries preaching medieval totalitarian bigotry. And Christianity as currently preached and practiced in Middle America is virtually Satan, by the standards of anyone who strives to follow the teachings of Jesus. Having degraded themselves to the level of political lobbies, most Christian churches should certainly be compelled to register as lobbyists and pay taxes.

In the final words of Richie Cunningham, "These Are Happy Days."
Until we all die from being around gays...

Addendum 4:10 p.m. PST
Heh, some people are pretty bitter about the Dirty South.
Read with fury!

Fuck The South

Oh, and here's a good slogan my good pal Ron came up with for the Dems:

Gay Marriage is GOOD for Marriage

Say it Loud and Proud!
Seriously, how is gay marriage BAD for marriage?
Two people loving each other. How is that a bad thing for society?
God knows we have enough people fighting and killing each other -- and we all know the bulk of those are domestic disputes (read your local police records if you don't believe me -- they're open to public).

Gay Marriage is GOOD for Marriage