Thursday, January 29, 2004

it's nice to be legal

after many months of deliberation due to my laziness gene, i finally bit the bullet and got to the damn DMV yesterday for my super-expired car registration.
for those of you who don't know, my birthday is October 18, so that's when my registration expired.
Yes, i stretched it for a good long while, but that's partly because i'm not driving all that much these days, pretty much exclusively in the cities only (Oakland and San Francisco, with a few sidetrips to Berkeley -- which is in Oakland, basically). i felt like i was pushing my luck too far. the worst was when i had a Oakland cop right behind me a few weeks ago, but thankfully, they didn't do anything.
whew.
i decided i no longer needed that undue stress. really, i could have just sent the renewal form in when it was due, on my birthday, but i didn't.

the DMV trip. now THAT was interesting.... (look for an update later today)


here's some good news about telemarketers. no longer will your phone say "out of area" when they call. let's see if the Bush Administration enforces it.

In case you didn't know, threesomes are lame. Or so I've heard.

And of course, James Brown has seen better days. But what an awesome picture.
Or for more, here's the story.

Listen, on a Wing and a prayer. Sorry.

Saturday, January 24, 2004

More remixes of the Howard Dean scream than you'd ever want

Click here

Love the one you're with.

Also, check out this theory about the potential fraud the U.S. Government is trying to sell about 9/11. Some interesting thoughts, for sure.
Here and here.

Friday, January 23, 2004

FAB FIVE FRIDAY #14

Congratulations. You're still alive.
Good job.

Onward...

1. Air Talkie Walkie (Astralwerks)
As good as Moon Safari, and definitely better than that 10,000 Hz Legend shite. Meditative, with a good amount of vocals and strings -- even banjo! --, and gets better as you progress through. If you liked the elegiac "Alone In Kyoto" (which i worshipped and also appears on the album) from Lost In Translation soundtrack, you'll like.

2. John Vanderslice Cellar Door (Barsuk)
Though not a longtime fan (or maybe it took me this long to "get it"), I am quite down with John Vanderslice's Cellar Door. His topical, narrative-style lyrics grabbed me from the get-go. And it's intricately produced. Yet, all the bleakness doesn't translate to overtly sad music (see "Coming And Going On Easy Terms," a fairly upbeat song about a guy in denial about his son being dead). Fucked up goodness.

3. Porest Prude Juice For The Heritage Swinger (Seeland)
Just hilarious audio madness, a la Negativland. SF's Mark Gergis (of Mono Pause) is behind Porest. He uses a ton of found sounds, cutting up songs and various other vocal samples that are surprisingly listenable plunderphonics. "Fist Dumpling" so rules, as does "Millennial Smoothie" (Jamba Juice shoutout) and "Skin Bitch" (a "reworking" of Gordon Lightfoot's "Sundown").

4. The swirling synthesizers in Steve Miller's "Fly Like An Eagle."
Every time i hear this song, it makes me think of that Brady Bunch episode in which Greg fakes a UFO citing to Bobby & Cindy ands up attracting the Feds to the Brady household. This should be the music playing when Bobby dreams of going off with the aliens (who look suspiciously like munchkins) in their cool spaceship. It's so '70s, those spaced-out Moog synths on heavy reverb (see also: Gary Wright's "Dream Weaver" and 10cc's "I'm Not In Love").

5. Stereolab Margerine Eclipse
As twee as you wanna be. Whee! No really, despite the loss of Mary Hansen, Margerine Eclipse is light, fluffy and fun with nifty little keyboard twinkles and twankles. It'll make you goofily happy.
Unless you're the angry sort.

BONUS4TWEE
6. Mice Parade Obrigado Saudade
(means "Thank You For Being Lovesick") (Bubble Core)
Delightfully quirky, quiet and crackly, includes vocal by Mum lead vocalist. Pretty. Gee.

AW GEE
-1. The demise of Captain Kangaroo.

Rest in peace Mr. Keeshan. Adieu, Picture Pages and Mr. Green Jeans.


Time keeps on slippin', slippin', slippin'... into the future.


and also...

Charlie Brown can shake it like a Polaroid picture too

Hey Ya!

Thursday, January 22, 2004

So wrong, it's gotta be right

Why Do People Have to Fight?

And especially for the ladies in the house...

fiddle faddle fennel funnel

Howard Dean sure does rock

and if that link doesn't work, try this one.

OR, just get 'em all from the MTV site.

Wednesday, January 21, 2004

There goes my theory that Limousines never get pulled over by cops

Just ask Art Garfunkel.

also, CNN ran this story earlier tonight regarding what are the favorite albums the Democratic candidates are listening to while campaigning. Kerry named the Beatles' Abbey Road, not much of a surprise, while Wesley Clark said he was listening to The Best Of Journey (no, really), and Howard Dean was rocking out with some Wyclef Jean's latest. i don't recall what they had down for John Edwards.
now, come on, howard dean is not rocking out to Wyclef Jean. no way.
and Wesley Clark listening to fucking Journey??? gross.

these are important stories that are affecting our very livelihood, now aren't they?

welcome to miami
uh oh, looks like the first edition of the new Miami Master List, now titled M3 Master List, and for some reason, it reminded me of the various times i traveled down to Florida for Spring Break, specifically Daytona Beach, my senior high school year when we went on a damn bus. ah, i recall when my friend Jeff got up and actually just started peeing on the carpet floor at the end of the bed, rather than go all the way to the bathroom. indeed, those were the days.

am i going to miami for WMC this year? hmmm, i'm leaning toward it, yes.

another word in my ever-growing list of words that are used by print publications that are never used in everyday speech:
pooh-poohed, much like rebuffed, is not used by you or i. ever.

here's a headline from the Hartford Courant, "Pope's `Passion' plug pooh-poohed"

hilarity, i tell you, grandma.

chicken.
Dean's in Trouble

i am starting to sense more unease among the so-called "Dean-iacs."
that whole yelling thing that seems to be such the uproar is fucking cracking my shit UP!!!

oh my god, this man, dr. dean, is so goddamned entertaining. it'll be a true joy to see this man spend all that money he raised, which will be in vain, as you know.

god, it's really fucking crazy. this presidential race is fucking funny. i am loving it, really.

the day-to-day drama, etc. i'm super-glad to see that lieberman is a non-starter. thank fucking god. yes, mikey, new hampshire DOES pick presidents.

but we shall see if that will be true.

i must admit. after kerry's win in Iowa, a supposed piece of shit non-kingmaker, as it were, i DID actually check out his website for the first time.

a little dull, but...the more i think about the genius, the improbability of Kerry being the eventual Dem nominee and having even sort of a chance against W...well, i think it somehow kind of works. he's a moderate, he's rich, basically he wouldn't be all that different from a Clinton Administration, really. plus he has the military experience, the war hero thing, while mr. bush, well, he's got that texas army national guard that he sort dropped outta, by accident, 'course.


currently playing: Azure Ray - damn, these guys fucking rule, don't they?" sheeit. and dammit it all to hell.
pushy


yeah.

Tuesday, January 20, 2004

Smug Mug

This is a stream-of-consciousness entry concerning George W. Bush's State Of The Union Address, Tuesday, January 20, 2004. I quote Mr. Bush often, but you will notice that some quotations marks arent' where they should be, simply because i decided to leave the raw text i wrote as it happened, as the Fool was saying it.
In other words, it may be a
BIT confusing as you read along.
Still, i feel like i captured my instant emotions in this context and therefore -- i'm being all artistic and shit -- i'm leaving it, as is.

and here we go....



OK, how sad am i? i rushed home to make sure i'd see the beginning of Bush' State of the Union Address.

And already it's cracking me up. What an asshole he is, trumpeting the Patriot Act, saying that it's necessary to renew many elements of the totally invasive act to "root out terrorism." Yeah, fuck you. Or root out its own citizens at a moment's notice from dickfuck John Asscroft.
it was funny, when bush mentioned that many things in the patriot act would be expiring next year and got a good amount of applause, undoubtedly from the Dems.

apparently america always does what it takes to make sure freedom prevails. that is, wherever we deem it necessary to stick our nose in and as long as it provides cash to american businesses up Bush's ass.
yeah, you're mr. tough guy bush. the u.s. will never be intimidated by thugs and assassins. the killers will fail and the iraqi people will live in freedom."
oh really? i'm sure they will by the end of June, when we're supposed to withdraw to ensure that bush doesn't get too fucked by any random killings of US soldiers and fuck up his potential election.

"no one can doubt the word of america?" oh really? how about when we promised to support afghanistan after we bombed the hell out of the taliban, the same people we readily worked with just months prior, in the hopes of gaining access to the potential oil pipeline running through the country. we had no problem with their tactics then. and last i checked, it was predominantly Saudi Arabian citizens who took part in the horrors of 9/11. Not the Taliban.
the Taliban were evil, yes, horrifyingly so, and we bombed them because it was pretty simple for Al Queda to set up shop there. but we did let them do it. it's not like we didn't know about it.

"the terrorists wanted to declare war on the United States and war is what they got." yeah, well, those terrorists were from a country that we're allies with. why didn't we bomb SA?

Sure, the world without Saddam is a safer place. but come on, bush, that's not why you invaded iraq.
oh please, now he's saying that all these other countries are involved in iraq? then why is paul Bremer at the UN right now attempting to get a UN coalition?

christ, he's is being such the tough guy. we don't need a permission slip to defend our country?
uh, ok.

oh no. now he's mentioned "God." please leave your God out of this.

we "confront" and "expect" things from other countries.
double the budget on national endowment on democracy? what?
bush seems like he wants a country that's more like a dictatorship, not a democracy. just cheap words he's throwing around.

we have no desire to dominate or become an empire? right.
just not in those specific terms. we are "leading the cause to freedom." right, right.

good job, georgie. you worked on saying "adversity" didn't you?

"this economy is strong and growing stronger."
yep. ok. jobs? good ones?

reduced the marraige penalty. good job.
lowered taxes.
"americans took those dollars and put them to work, driving this economy forward.
home ownership rates. highest ever."
exports are growing. " what about the huge export disparity with China, mr. bush?

"these numbers confirm that the american people are using their money far better than government would have and you were right to return it."
fuck you.

ooh, also a changing economy. we're more productive...health care and biotechnology (popular bay area), ah the "no child left behind act," which Bush gutted, as well as education. we're making progress twoard excellence for every child in america."

and, quick edit to kids hanging out in the audience.

status quo always has defenders. god, he comes off as such an arrogant prick. he knows best. everyone else is wrong. he's always right.

Jobs of the 21st Century, larger Pell grants for students. sounds great. (more kid shots). where will the money come from, George?

see, he says all these things that he wants to do but doesnt' follow up on the domestic issues.

Help more americans in growing productivty.
pro-growth economic

permanent tax cuts. riiiight. easy to say.

my god, he comes off so scary. really a harsh dictator, for sure.
oop, messed up "federal."
protect who from frivolous lawsuits? big business for sure.

modernize electricity, promote conservation and make america less reliant on foreign sources of energy. hard to lie through that whopper, george. you're an oil guy. you know that's where it comes from. there simply isn't oil here. what about alternative forms of energy?
jesus. such a crock of shit, all that. be vague.

privatizing social security??? oh yeah, great idea. uh huh. source of ownership for the american people?

budget, protects homeland, cut wasteful spending and be wise with the people's money. cut deficit in half over next five years??? ha ha ha.

i oppose amnesty. seems less passionate about this part. more like he's reading it.
ooh, a red-faced Asscroft. god, he's gross.

ooh, now it's on to medicare. exciting. no really. so exciting.
the drug discount card. too bad there's a HUGE loophole between the minimum/maximum limits.
(quick edit to gray panther).

drug bills cut in half...not true.

refundable tax credit to allow people to buy affordable health insurance.

stealing all these democratic

eliminate frivolous lawsuits for the medical profession. wellllll, that's a touchy subject.
catastrophic insurance can deduct 100% from our taxes.
government health care system is the wrong prescription!!!

holy fuck, he's angry. we will preserve private medicine!!! fucking no way!!!

damn, bush sooo selfish and mean of you.

to protect the health care system. and money from it.

ohhh god, now it's on to drugs.
400,000 fewer teens are using drugs. ok.

community based strategy to reduce demand for illegal drugs.
ha ha ha ha ha ha.
$23 million that want to use drug testing to 'save children's lives.'
please. for school children.
so arbitrary.

sports, team owners and get rid of steroids now. huh. weird.
tom brady, new england patriots QB in the crowd. he's clapping and super stoked.

STD time! sweet. prevent them from ever coming parents? double funding for abstinence programs, only certain way for young people to avoid STDs....oh. my. god.

fantasyland. jesus.

decisions they make can affect health and character. send right messages to our children. also value the institution of marriage. principal stand enduring institutions of our civilzation, defense of marriage act. protects marriage under federal law between man and woman.
people's voice must be heard. judges insist arbitrary will on people. our nation must defend the sanctity of marriage. cut to Santorum, gross pigfucker.
so is he saying that he's for a constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage or what? dignity and value in god's sight. please shut the fuck up. bored african american couple cut to.

that was weird.

see, bush didn't necessarily completely spell out what he was saying there...alluding to the a constitutional change though, so maybe he is. i'll have to look at that statement more.

faith based charities?? law wont' discriminate against them again. ok. what?

4-year $300 million prison relcation program? (cut to prisoner relocation system chief) a new proposal." america is the land to second chance."

"we're living in historic times." some letter from a kid named Ashley Pierson on how to save america. pandering to the troops time.
how about mentioning the 500 soldiers killed in YOUR war?

we now move forward with ??? and faith.

May God continue to bless America.


Just finished watching the immediate post-speech analysis by CBS and MY GOD, Dan Rather was soooo fawning about his speech, going on and on about how confident Bush was "and why shouldn't he be??" he says, going on about the majority in the House and Senate, the Supreme court (who appointed him, conveniently)...but then at the very end, Rather says "and now, in a moment, we'll hear from the OPPOSITION party." OK, the democrats are apparently the ENEMY in this scenario.
wow. just such bullshit. unbelievable pandering.

the press is already hooking on the line that "We don't need a permission slip to defend America" which was a swipe at Howard Dean's recent comment that we should have commiserated with other countries before deciding to act hastily and invade Iraq. which makes perfect sense, Georgie.

Monday, January 19, 2004

Crazy! John Kerry pulls it out in Iowa, with John Edwards a very close second

Well, i can't believe it. John Kerry pulled it out in Iowa with a win there. To be honest, months ago i was praising Kerry, that i liked his balance of being a Clinton-type Dem but not nearly as sleazy as ol' bill was. i love bill, but c'mon.
So i hope this brings him up in the polls for new hampshire. wow, and who would have imagined that Dean placed third? But i dunno, we'll see what happens in New Hampshire now. Clark is surging, and this will surely give a bounce to Kerry and Edwards, who was a close second in Iowa. It looks like Gephardt is going to drop out, which is a good idea. Nice enough fella but he's just not cut out to be prez.
Dunno why. Some people have it, some people don't. He doesn't.

but you know, that's one thing that i think troubles people about Dean. I'm just not totally sure if he could pull it off. Hence, why i've always been hesitant about him. I do like him though. i like his fiesty nature and i think that's what's been shaking things up. But Kerry really does have the experience, for sure. So funny how the press just kinda wrote him off a long time ago. And somehow out of nowhere, he pulls it out. Just nuts. Especially for the fact he's from Massachusetts. He's not a hometown boy by any stretch.

Plus all of Kerry's military heroism doesn't hurt. In fact, that could really help him get the moderate vote down the stretch. And Bush couldn't say shit his military might. Though this would mean yet another uber-wealthy man competing for high office and he's been a politician for a long time. we'll see what happens in New Hampshire. It's really a four-man race at this point and honestly, it's anybody's ball game right now. Kerry, Dean, Edwards and Clark.

Dammit Lieberman, would you just quit already? once you lose in New Hampshire? Please?

And on the heels of this interesting news, comes some troubling numbers for Bush.

Sunday, January 18, 2004

Sales of G.I. Joe have gone up significantly in the past couple years, so it's come to this...

Still a pop culture icon, and now he likes reggae!

And don't get confused now. Microsoft and Mike Rowe Soft are soooo not the same thing. I can tell how confused you were too.
Check out this ridiculous lawsuit from Bill Gates and friends.

and then there's this oldie but still kinda funny.

Or Jack Black's hilarious take on the Fellowship of the Ring.

Better watch out ruthless music piraters. The RIAA Death Squad will find you. And destroy you.

Friday, January 16, 2004

from The Hamster site

This is too funny to ignore. Catherine Bosley, a news anchor in Youngstown, Ohio, decided to have a bit of fun while vacationing in Key West last year and entered a wet t-shirt contest. unfortunately, people were taking her photo when she decided to get extra crazy and strip down to her birthday suit.

here's her former station's news director, explaining Catherine Bosley's resignation from the station here.

and here's the photos (WARNING: somewhat explicit photos of non-clothed female human. proceed with extreme caution, for this could be uncharted territory for some) from said event, along with another story about it from a San Antonio TV station.

allah/god/buddah/ringo bless the internet.

Thursday, January 15, 2004

Finally, some good news...

Bush Booed at Martin Luther King Gravesite

and this essay from NY Newsday definitely gave me some fiery hope for change.
This Guy Can Rock the White House

on the other hand, the Bush Admin continues to fight reality any way they can
White House opposes UN report on obesity

common sense, you might say, that people are fatter than ever. yet, we have a president who lives in fantasyland.
What the fuck? how can you deny the growing problem of obesity?
seriously. what is wrong with these people that they refuse to believe anything that might be perceived as contradictory to what their special interests are paying them to believe?
same way that they deny that global warming is happening, in the face of a shitload of science that says otherwise.

"science??!!" they scoff. "what do scientists know about real life?"

just like they pointed out on The Daily Show last night (hilariously), Bush is trashing the environment every chance he can because he thinks the Earth is history. hence, his newfound commitment to go to the moon and eventually Mars. so all the people of "like-minded, superior intellect" can go somewhere else and repopulate, start over.

sounds ridiculous, but then again, our modern world is a fucking circus.
lapped up by the pathetically ignorant populous.

yes, we're smart all right, we Americans.
yep.

now let's get to work on getting that constitutional amendment banning gay marriage up and running again. that's what's really important, what's really slowing me down in my day to day life. all the damn gays and their selfish need to be like "normal" (i.e heterosexual) humans. fucking bullshit. how can people be so concerned with Iraqi civilians being killed on a daily basis when we've got gays advancing their doctrine onto the innocent children of america. next thing you know, gays will be everywhere. and then our species will end. damn. all because of selfish pleasure. bullshit, i tell ya.

actually, Jon Stewart cracked me up last night in his surprisingly great interview with Sen. Joe Biden Dem-Delaware (the fool who pushed for the so-called "Rave Act" last year), talking about the Bush Admin, Iraq and whatnot.
They were talking all serious policy issues and with all seriousness, asks Biden, "So, is Dick Cheney really a murderous cyborg or what?"

Wednesday, January 14, 2004

...and where the fuck is Spalding Gray?

i am curious.

i would be concerned if i knew him. but i don't know him. he's a likeable fellow, sure. probably dead.

or in bed with treebeard.

it's late. i need more pudding.

my left eye hurts

love,
liz phair

Tuesday, January 13, 2004

best albums of 2003
not necessarily in order -- it changes from day to day

1. White Stripes Elephant (V2) - As much as i didn't want to include this album in my Top 10 -- especially after seeing how it was near or at the top of a jillion other "Best of 2003" lists by various publications -- the fact remains that "Elephant" is a great album from start to finish.�I still haven't tired of listening to it more than�eight months after it was released.�And the White Stripes did it on their terms, a rarity in modern popular music.

2. New Pornographers Electric Version (Matador) - So damn catchy, it's scary. The New Pornographers managed to conjure up just the right amount of undeniable pop hooks with smart lyrics and complex arrangements. You can tell the band was having a lot of fun making this record.

3. Radiohead Hail To The Thief (Capitol) - Not only was this my favorite politically-oriented album of the year (sorry, Quasi!), it was yet another in a long string of great albums produced by this Oxford, England quintet. The standard is very high for Radiohead and they have yet to falter - a testament to this band's talent. And despite the hype that this was radiohead's return to rock, the fact is the group merely toned down some of the more obvious electronic elements.

4. The Sea And Cake One Bedroom (Thrill Jockey) - More than a year after its release, I'm still in love with the Chicago-based band's seemingly effortless 10-song pop glide through ethereal indie pop. And yet another band that manages to combine electronic music elements to their advantage.

5. Shins Chutes Too Narrow (Sub Pop) - Near-perfect pop record from this New Mexico-based group. James Mercer is truly a gifted songwriter.

6. Manitoba Up in Flames (Domino/Leaf) - Gorgeous, high-density�album from Canada's Manitoba that recalls the "wall of sound" shoegazer vibe of a decade ago with a breezy, uplifting tone.

7. The Rapture Echoes (Universal) - This album was a hard sell to me at first, but it steadily grew on me the more i listened, especially after seeing them perform life. Screechy and scratchy, "Echoes" successfully combined an early '80s new wave punk�ethoes with crunchy, retro/new 4/4 dance beats and helped pave the way for rock's continued invasion of the dancefloor.

8. Psychonauts Songs For Creatures (EFA) - Haunting, evocative record that's not quite electronic, not quite rock/pop, but highly addictive, emotion-fueled music.

9. Goldfrapp Black Cherry (Mute) - Fans of her earlier work cried foul that Goldfrapp had gotten too caught up in the trendy electroclash sound, but the lush, pristine-like production assembled behind her eloquent vocals make this a headphone maven's wet dream.

10. Broadcast Haha Sound (Warp) - Garage rock for the electronic set, Broadcast's rich, fluid style and carefully paced album make this a surprising gem.

Saturday, January 10, 2004

strange days

jim morrison knew what he was talking about, didn't he?

i mean, fuck, we live in a world in which Curve sounds exactly the same in 2003 as they did in 1992? how is that possible?

a world in which my cat ("the kitty") tries to constantly stop me from writing down these sordid tales i'm telling by laying on my wrist whilst i'm attempting to navigate this hear computer thingie.

a world in which courtney love and whitney houston still exist and john lennon and john belushi do not?

what is going on?

it's fucking bullshit, everything. the whole lot.
everything you know. it's all bullshit.
our lives, bullshit.
see, dammit, maybe the matrix was right. we are all drones.
see, look at me get all heavy duty and shit.
see, i'm just a man with a gun not in my hand.

or a knife. though i better watch my girlfriend. look what happened to elliott smith.
i should keep things positive, yes? in my personal writings on the world wide web, where nobody will EVER find out what i'm saying.

see it's all secret.

and i know this. my atari 2600 never did me no wrong. i never got no colecovision. shit.

simple things.

it's all about simple things.

the nothingness is the everythingness.

ant traps are a good thing.



you know, i just thought of something.
sometimes, being too enlightened, too educated about the world and all the SHIT that is going on, can be a negative thing.
maybe ignorant bliss is the path to the happiness.
i don't really believe that, but it's a neat idea.
what if i've got it all wrong too?
god knows, i wish my enlightened views could somehow translate to millions/billions of dollars at my disposal.
shit, that'd be like, super-cool.
for sure.

but of course, i'm also a realist, which is weird cuz i also consider myself a idealist (yeah, big duality issues--- still haven't seen a therapist though).
it's all a big jumbled mess, you see.

i feel like, with apologies to ralph macchio, i'm at a crossroads right now. and i've gotta make the right choice or end up like buster poindexter.
or like bert convy, bill bixby or michael landon.
i wanna be like jack barry. he was fucking cool on the joker's wild.

those were the days.
fuck yeah.
ABC's That's Incredible!was a cool show too. fran tarkenton (how can you go wrong with a former NFL quarterback as your host?), cathy lee crosby (slut) and john davidson (cheeseball). they fucking rocked.
and they made me more scared of ghosts than i already was.

Friday, January 09, 2004

Thursday, January 08, 2004

Congratulations, you're the song of the morning

Good job, really.
All great.
Your contribution is appreciated.
Thanks so much for all you've done.

No really, wonderful, just wonderful.

(ahem)

OK, the envelope, if you please?

Thank you, thank you so much.
Thanks.

Heh Heh.

Yes, Here we go.

Alright, and new winner and champion song of the morning we're now experiencing, here, in this life, today, right now, in the Pacific Standard Time Zone in Oakland, California, Thursday, January 8, 2004, at 10:36 a.m., is.........

(drum roll, mr. maestro)

(Thank you. Thanks so much for being here for this wonderful occasion).


"VORTEX"

BY MS. KELLI HAND,

AKA "K-HAND"

FROM DETROIT, MICHIGAN

OFF THE READY FOR THE DARKNESS CD.



the rising, rippling drum and texture effects combined with its driving bottom end and minimal production made this song the perfect song of the moment for me, tim pratt, right here, right now.

Thanks so much for joining me on this wonderful occasion.
Now, back to the matter at hand.


Shove it.

Wednesday, January 07, 2004

For Your Viewing and Listening Pleasure

The Lord Works in very mysterious ways:
Jump-Roping For Jesus!

Never get completely sloshed when you're going to be interviewed on TV
Say it ain't so, Broadway Joe!

Sunday, January 04, 2004

Top 10 best-selling albums of 2003

Here's a complete rundown of 2003's Top 10 best-selling albums, per Nielsen SoundScan:

1. Get Rich or Die Tryin', 50 Cent, 6.5 million copies
2. Come Away with Me, Norah Jones, 5.1 million
3. Meteora, Linkin Park, 3.5 million
4. Fallen, Evanescence, 3.4 million
5. Speakerboxx/The Love Below, OutKast, 3.1 million
6. Dangerously in Love, Beyonc�, 2.5 million
7. Chocolate Factory, R. Kelly, 2.4 million
8. Metamorphosis, Hilary Duff, 2.4 million
9. Shock'n Y'All, Toby Keith, 2.3 million
10. Rush of Blood to the Head, Coldplay, 2.2 million

How many of these albums are in my possession?
Just 50 Cent and OutKast. Yep, that's it. I've heard some of the Toby Keith, Coldplay, Evanescence, Norah Jones and Beyonce albums.
but, yeah.
This is a very sad list, I realize.
Not necessarily a good year for music.

But enough about shit.
My own personal Top 10 list of 2003 is coming very soon!

oh and David Cross is tonight!
Yes!

Friday, January 02, 2004

It's 2004 ... Do you know where your ellipse is?
with apologies to Daniel Webster

can you believe it?
it's 2004.
somebody the other night (that would be NYE - acronyms are so cool) mentioned that '04 just "sounds better than '03." and i would agree.

was it the fact that '03 is an odd number?
fuck, it was a VERY odd year. obviously you know that.

in my opinion, the terrorists have already won.
our way of life is permanently altered and we will never go back to the relative contented ignorant bliss of the late '90s. i'm happy to have lived through the good times, now being able to better recognize the happy times from the not-so-happy.

currently, we live in a not-so-happy time.
but you know, like everything else in this thing called life (with apologies to mr. prince rogers nelson), we run in cycles. forever fluid, ever-changing.

things will bounce back (hmmm, don't want this to devolve into pep talk, though).
but they will.
maybe not for a long time though.
see, we're also impatient beings, at least americans are.
or more so than most of the rest of the world.
hence, the near-constant need by the broadcast media (print too, though not quite as much) to trumpet any sign of positivity in all aspects of life. obviously the economy is a big one here.
"more jobs!"
"the nasdaq reach 2000 again! life is good again."

yeah, but where are those jobs? service sector primarily, which pay next to nothing, not much above poverty line.

we just REALLY REALLY want things to be better.
and sooner rather than later.
but that's not reality.
despite what the bush administration would have you believe.

i saw a great cartoon the other day, in Doonesbury actually, basically saying that the bush admin uses 9-11 as reasoning for virtually everything they do, like restricting our civil liberties, favoring big business/corporate america over pretty much everything and everyone else - never mind the poor, middle class, what have you, or the environment, let future generations deal with our shit.

yeah, great example mr. bush. you act like a spoiled child that you are.
"america is MINE! I'll do whatever i want to!"

apparently, you are.

but you know, i don't want to begin the new year bitter.
though i'm not usually one to be all gooey-eyed and take note of previous miscalculations and make resolutions to improve my well-being, i, uh, am making an exception this year.

because, dammit jim, i'm worth it.
and also because al franken told me.

this is tim pratt, for marketplace.


p.s. longer letter later friends. the rains are pitter-pattering on my skylight directly above me, i hear the white noise of the bart train traveling by to destinations known, my kitty frankie has is face buried in the blankets on my bed, and i wanna watch the rest of my new DVD, Lord Of the Rings: The Two Towers.
and yeah, i know you're going "that's the REAL reason he's ending abruptly."

whatever.