how retarded am i??

pretty damn retarded, apparently. today, while at brolin's house visiting, i dropped my damn cellphone into the toilet. luckily it was pre-pee, but still. it was the goddamn toilet.
it doesn't seem to be working very well at the moment, though i have it plugged in to give it some juice love.

still bad.

first i hit xlr8r to scan through a bunch of records and cds to review in the 12-inch reviews. that took a good two hours. then it was on to the mission to pick up brolin, where the horrifying accident occurred.
then...it was on to upper haight for love, life liberty and pursuit of shooeiness.
and sexual attention.

no really, it was to hit amoeba to trade back some muzak for quick cash...didn't do that well at ol' amoeba this time around though. they were discriminating against me due to me having the gout, i believe it.
it's bullshit. they are so mean to me.
i will shoot them.
then i did on ward christian soliders and fucked around with pick up stix and then was on my merry way. you hate me when i'm angry. don't you?

shoot me, like the vietcong.
i am the vietcong.

you are the vietcong.
and this is my tet offensive.

so yeah...after the haight experience, which also included a stop-in with mr. johnny for love of the will, mind and body. that was a fine time had by many.
we walked and gawked some more at all the ugly ladies pushing us down and stripping down to their bare asses in front of us. they loved us and wanted to marry us. but we are straight, not sour, and it didn't last but a wrinkle in time.
damn you perriwinkle, i hate your juice berry jacket.

so then, ,fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you.
don't you like the unwarranted abuse?
i know i do.
like dishing the unwarranted abuse. to you and yours.
wow, what happened last night?
did i hit a tree or what?
juice.

ok...so then we left haight monstrosity and stopped off for a daycap at zeigeist, king of the beers and leader of mamman.
we met up with molly d and rosemary pepper for love, life, conversation and zany card tricks.
zeitgeist was packed and rightly so for being such a nice day.
damn.
it was gorgeous, more gorgeous than the pie sitting on grandma tilly's kitchen window overlooking the vast vista landscape in the middle of kansas.
more than that.
fudge is good.

so we stayed for two beverages.
and it was good.
the bbq was a-blazing.
the fire was ruthless and hard.

packed it was. grand mal seizure and shit.
damn.
so after that we skated outside for sun fun hon and buns and what do we see but a giant truck nail this guy on a motorcycle. it was like it happened in slow motion. trippy. the dude in the truck completely smashed the thing, knocked the guy forward and luckily the dude seemed ok. he was shaken up and pissed as fuck. i heard him say "you totaled my motorcycle!"
and it was totalled. the guy in the truck was kinda wimpy and apologizing profusely. it was obvious it was his fault. freaky for sure.
when somebody gets nailed it's a very sickly sound.
sound.

so yeah, that was a trip.
plenty of other people were witnesses besides us so we didn't feel compelled to stay. the guy seemed to be physically ok, so we moved on.
love.
sex.
passion.
chair.
mongoloid.
donald duck.
heiffer.
don't stop your mouth from probing the membrane of delivery.

so yeah...fuck.
then on the way back dropping off ol' brolin, we saw dudes getting cuffed, searched and destroyed by the local san francisco pd. love america, love law enforcement. we force you.

tonight i dj in berkeley. you know where it is. don't tell me not to.
i must go clean up the kitty litter that is nasty.
i do not want to.
but it is something i must do. or face the wrath of the wraith.
and nobody wants that.
screw milk.

pudgy push