Tuesday, March 15, 2005

3 Great Mysteries / Shadow Dancing

3 Great Mysteries Of Life

Throughout my many days of yore, i often ponder the very essence of life, the things that really get my noggin working itself into a frenzy, a thinking cap squared kind of shit.
you understand what i'm saying.
these aren't the droids you're looking for.
sexual healing is key.

as you know, i'm leading.
(currently listening to: beat pharmacy earthly delights (wave))

so here we are ... the Three (3/thrice/tri) Great Mysteries Of Life, according to me, here and now..
for all ye olde times.

    1. Saying God Bless You After Sneezing

    What is up with this?
    i mean, there's like this weird peer pressure to throw out the requisite 'god bless you' (with definite yet understated authority and wisdom behind that shit) immediately after someone sneezes. And if you don't, well, the evil spirits are going to be able jump right in to your mouth and seize your very soul. Or you'll get the Plague.
    Then, where will you be? It'll be like The Exorcist or some shit.
    For those of you dying to know the answer, here's the straight dope on the Why we do this.
    On purpose, i just don't say it.
    I don't feel the need. You're not going to get the Plague if i don't say it. I'm pretty sure of that.

    2. Females incessantly pulling down their tops.

    In my travels far and wide across this great land of ours, this is a generalization that i'm afraid rings true from sea to shining sea.
    Women are constantly pulling their shirts down further. I'm not sure if they're trying to cover up something (hint: it doesn't work if you are trying to cover something up, unless you have a shirt that falls past the bottom of your butt and if that's the case, you're likely wearing a dress), feeling anxious that someone can actually see their backside and they're not able to thoroughly check it out to make sure nothing funny's going on, or secretly long to wear a burqua, but it's true.
    Women young and old do this all the time.
    I see it every day, often when getting up after sitting for awhile or on their way somewhere. I guess it's for a crisper look though it really does nothing.

    If you're that worried, why not try wearing a longer shirt and/or pants to avoid potential butt cleavage?
    Not to say i have a problem with this. I'm not exactly offended by the recent phenomenon known as butt cleavage.

    But it is a mystery.

    3.People that don't carry ID with them.

    Why would you NOT carry it with you at ALL times?
    I'm amazed at the number of times i've heard people say as they were about to go into a bar or club, "Oh, i forgot my ID. Can you just let me in? I'm 24." or whatever age they are.
    Uh, no.
    That doesn't work. Vouching for yourself doesn't work.
    Hello! McFly! Anybody home?
    the only time i can think of when i wouldn't want to bring my ID with me is if I'm going to a nudist colony. And even then, i'd leave it in the car, just in case.
    You don't really need one at Burning Man either, but it still comes with me to the playa.
    There's a little thing called Driving that gets in the way of NOT bringing one's license.

    So yeah, astounding to me that people would actually get ready and go out somewhere and not bring along an ID.
    Maybe if you're only 17, you wouldn't need it because there's not a whole hell of a lot you can do with an ID at 17, other than get yourself into an R-rated movie.
    And what kid can't get into an r-rated movie?



The Best Video The World Has Ever Known
Who could this be? why it's "Apache/Bubblesex" by THE Tommy Seebach ("The King of Danish Eurovision") and The Seebach Band, reaching all the way back to 1977, yo!
Weight Watchers Recipe Cards, Circa 1974
A great way to enjoy life the best way you can.
You enjoy things.
It's all part of this thing we call life.
We can be as one.
We just have to imagine.
You can stab me in the heart now with your bident.
David Byrne Really, REALLY Loves PowerPoint. it's true!
Don't Fuck With These People
Lounging Forevermore
Delicious Again, Peter

Hackers breach LexisNexis, grab info on 32,000 people (nice work if you can get it)
Slide, Slide, Slippity Slide
Dominican Man Dies After Exceeding Cojones Ratio, Shuttlecocks Revolt
Here comes M.I.A.
the hype machine has been in overdrive for the past few months for this redhot female rapper from Sri Lanka, by way of London.
I can't wait to see her this Wednesday night at The Independent.
she's all the rage.
For more, check her in this video or her website.


shuttlecock christmas

boxcar willie

datos de nutricion

nude is different from naked

paperback writer

It's the Saddest Night Out in the USA

And this is one of the saddest acting descriptions in the USA i've ever read:
'Appeared As Jason Voorhees. A Horror Movie Character Many Fans Regard As One Of The Most Fearsome Ever'


... back to the living ...



1. LCD Soundsystem LCD Soundsystem (2005)

i love music snobbery. fucking rocks!!
it's totally all over the place.
'daft punk is playing at my house' fucking kills.
no question.
carefully and beautifully recorded.
admittedly, almost flawless.
as hard as that is to say.
but it's just goddamn good.

2. Ulrich Schnauss "Blumenwiese Neben Autobahn" from Far Away Trains Passing By (2001)

this song makes me want to cry.
but in a totally hip cool way your dad would be down with.
holy shit, this track is just...amazing.
jaw already in a big heap on the floor.
joyously dreamy this is. the chirpy keyboards.
the pin-sharp beats.
heaven Ulrich is from.
(sidenote to DJs: mixes well with Telefon Tel Aviv)

3. Tricky "Excess" from Blowback (2001)

for some strange reason, i've rediscovered this song lately, the scratchy-throated Tricky Kid whose arrogance often exceeds his actual talent. Yet, sometimes he can still throw down a great track and this is one of them.
a real builder of a song that opens the album (unfortunately most of the rest of the album is utter shite) with a great piano line, sinister beat and, like most great Tricky tracks, a sizzling female vocalist or two to pump up the vibe.
though i still miss Martina Topley-Bird from back in the early Tricky days.

4. New Order Waiting For The Sirens' Call (released 04.26.05)

run right out and order yourself a copy of the New Order album. It's surprisingly solid, one of the better New Order albums in many years, i'd say. the keyboards are less chintzy, the guitars bolder, the songwriting better. that simple. I just scored this advance so i need to listen to it more but what i've heard thus far, i'm digging on. It's encouraging to know a band this old, formed after the demise of Joy Division in the early 1980s, can still come up with new, innovative and vital music.

5. The Books Lost And Safe (released 04.05.05)

The third album from this environmental and found sound electroacoustic outfit finds them better than ever. It's a weird, tripped-out clattery audio experience from start to finish, with off-kilter vocals supported by equally on-kilter banjo playing and odd audio incorporated into the music.
this takes a few listens but it's hard to knock an album that harkens back to when you were in elementary school, putting your heads down on your desk to escape the world for a few minutes while the teacher softly reads a story to the class.
It's That kind of fun.

Live Longer...

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