I'm feeling weird/shitty/scared

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i don't want this to be true. how can this be true? it seems like the death knell for our future, at least a hopeful and positive future.
it's not over yet, there are still votes that need to be counted in ohio, but i'm nervous. and scared.
this is like bizarro world.
nothing seems right.
what the fuck is happening?
what the fuck is wrong with america?
what the fuck?

the mood is very somber.
it feels like that to me. at least.
nobody was on the streets. it was very dead.

the drive home from work was tense and intense.
i'm just stunned.
fucking stunned. what the fucking is wrong with america?

how can this be?
jesus.

-----------------------------

here's a realtime IM session i'm having with my pal in Cinci. he's a fine pal. him.

AIM IM with m____onthemic
10:18 PM
yeah it's over
puto
buttcake
10:20 PM
i'm speechless
why is this hapening
people are weak and like to be led.
poorly
they like to think god is on their side
it's just unbelievable
plus they are assholes
and dems are lazy or stupid too
i dunno
i really thought it was over for them
the GOP has come out opf the woodwork
even the news guys seem grim. it's like everyone with a brain knows this is grave
nobody on tv seems celebratory
supreme court
like half the court, easily
daschle is toast
i was so ready to be done with Bush/cheney
god
i didn't think there could be 4 more years
me either
Thanks media
yep
scum
so afraid of whiningGOP fucks
you know, cnn still hasn't called ohio for bush
eh, 51/48, 83%
i'm sorry, 89%
what happens now?
i just don't even know
bush will claim victory so its harder to take away....ustlike in 2000
yep
one good note. medical marijuana is up 63/36 here in oakland right now
you'll need it
dude, i feel like the coasts are separate from teh rest of the country.
i can see boycotts of people in the fly-over states
its like family youve grown apart from and canno longer relate to
man
fuck
i'm so glad i'm not of draft age
i'd be hella freakeed if i was 18 right now
california should secede
we could do it
kick out arnold and let him run for president of the rest
california is the 4th or 5th largest economy in the world
wait, kick out arnold
?
of Cali
10:35 PM
arnold isn't as bad as i expected him to be.
frankly,.i'd take him over bush for sure
i mean, the recall was dirty...
but...youknow
what can youd
ohio is in bush column
says who?
oh, shitty local affiliate
nope, 51/48 bush 90%
it's not declared
this guy on local abc affiliate just referred to rhenquist opening as a 'donnybrook'
fuckthegop
anti-gop stuff is going to get much harsher
NOTMYPRESIDENT
yah
btw, that stem cell proposition, gona pass
though i think it's lame because it's a bond measure (i'm giving you cali updates)
all good.
three strikes law repeal is winning though schwarzenegger has been saturating the airwaves saying to vote no
but only 37%
mental health servives prop is winning
how does same sex marriage hurt people?
it boggles my mind
nontribal game expansion is being rejected
people hate gays
tribal gaming compacts defeated...arnold helped defeat
people hate gays
their loving church tells them so
it really does feel more and more like california is separate from the rest of the country
it's big enough to be a country
people here stay in the state a lot
you'd have a dangerous,unpredictable neighbor
it's weird
uh yeah
it won't happen
we need federal funds
this just makes me believe in less than ever
how can i believe in my government anymore?
i can't
coors lost
yay!
really????
fuck yeah
nice
reduce violent crime measure in oakland, winning
medical marijuana still winning big
prostitution enforcement in berkeley losing
to legalize prostitution
10:45 PM
weird. medical mariujuana in berkeley is losing 53/47 right now
dude, what about absentee ballots?
are those being counted in ohio per se?
in these numbers?
ohio is currently....
smaller counties
51/49 92%
puto
nbc has ohio as bush
4 more years of that smirk
i'm happy coors lost
former sf mayor willie brown is not conceding ohio, he's saying some of the networks are projecting it too early
on KRON, local ind.
bush is going to win new mexico
iowa is still in play
wisconsin kerry
maybe
i think kerry wins wisc.
they just said fox and nbc has projected ohio but no one else has
everyone else is open
i agree with you on cheese heads
what about New Hampshire. What's wrong with them?
i'm getting drunk
new hampshire
?
surrounded by red
i thought nh was kerry
still in play
really, cspan says kerry
eh, 51/49 kerry, 93% reporting
tight
still 51/49 ohio 92
%
i got all these crazy political calls this past weekend
p_to
10:55 PM
is Ae there?
if so, tell her i send greetings of jovial goodness
if not, tell her something else
frank just gave up on watching tv
puto
shovel
clacker
i'm talking to myself

sorry. there was a cop at my door
11:00 PM
what?
christ, it's only 52/48 kerry in cali right now and 38% reporting
yeah. he;s knocking on doors trying to find out if we know the people that live in this one building
fox news is gving it to ohio, local fox affiliate
fuck
cop
crazy
you're busted
my guess is a house alarm was triggered somehow
ah
plus i'm busted
what
no. just kidding
puto
kerry campaign is disputing the calls for ohio by fox
according to local fox affliiate
hey
news
something about iowa not going to be done counting
barbara boxer won
big surprise
she's dancing with diane feinstein with arms raised and feinstein is barely moving, looking really uncomforable
11:05 PM
N.H. goes Kerry. the first switch from 2000
nice
i LOVE my new latptop btw
i was using doug's airport when i was talking to you earlier
you were SO RIGHT about laptop
ton of music software on here already
nice. they look fun
planning to use for dj-ing soon?
maybe
things are going strong in dj dept, i feel
this was a big/good move for me...goning to use to record a lot more oddball vinyl i have
not going to make this a mp3 heavy machine
itunes will be light
make my home machine my music storage
edwards is going to make a statement.
my desktop
oh shit, what channel
your desktop like a super-ipod
CBS just said that
cbs here is local affiliate
they also said Kerry camp is claiming a lead in Ohio
see
i think they atre at least trying to set up an appeal/reccount
yeah
11:10 PM
i'm not seeing that
seeing it on cnn
provisional ballots
heh
its talk between rather and others
yeah, here it's local affiliates because it's 11 news time
gotcha
51/49 ohio i'm seeing
i like the networks being more gunshy this year
nobody is jumping to conclusions
fucking youth vote being dissed on cnn
yes. its the one thing that got fixed since last time
jeff greenfield
yeah
i fucking hate larry
king
he's a walking skeleton
pssssssss
diss the youth vote. Crush their spirit and keep them from voting again....just like the GOP wants
man
i hate wolf blitzer
chump
tv news sucks
i don't like many CNN personalities
they all suck
uh oh, marijuana is losing now
in oakland
and weird, prostitution legality is now winning
Poor Dan Rather is holding out hope.
heh
maybe there will be a late reversal in Ohio
i love dan rather even though i hate him
flip-flopper
blackwell in ohio is speaking rightg now
Keyes did well
keyes? how well?
blackwell is black?
yep. Black cincinnati republican
he's refuting claims made by newtworks on provisional ballots
Michigan goes Kerry
trending toward 175,000 provisional ballots at the high end he just said
your sec. of state in ohio
watchign live covearge
kenneth blackwell
heh, that's in margin of difference
heh
puto
local dude just called ohio 'this could be this year's florida'
cinci
?
shuttlecock
cumquat
puddle
11:20 PM
sumptuous
pupple-fuss
kerry is up in mich
51/48 77%
CBS says its his
yeah?
they colored it blue
weird, making assumptions
dude
its a rally
shuttlecock
i forget it's 2"30 in the east
it's only 1120 here
...only to be crushed by a 4th quarter fumble
fumble
cumquat
arnold hasn't shown up to his hq yet
they just said
you know, arnold has a 65% approval rating?
it's crazy
jesse ventura has hair nwo?
he's in some weird pro-indian ad they just showed
weird
they are getting ready for Edwards to speak in Boston
he has a complex beard and corresponding facial hair. ...they are NOT conceding, i say
no
oh no, more footage of barbara boxer holding hands up in air sort of dancing with dianne feinstein, very uncomfortably
footage
i am still seeing local cbs coverage
i'll yell when i see him
here comes edwards
i see him
resolute
we can wait one more night
give them their own medecine
oh man
this may be long again
he slammed his book
reassurance to the peeps
yay!
ugh
enough with the victory punchs
he's stiff
good move on their part
yeah. not the positive i thought he'd be
it'd be rad if nevada went to kerry
watching nbc now w/ russert
brokaw is gettin age spots
125,327 difference in ohio
fuck
28.989 ahead bush for n.m.
kerry up 108,000 in mn
wisconsin kerry up 15,781, 87%
iowa 11,486, 97% bush
nevada 16.392 bush
kujp
michigan kerry up 90,000
oooh, kerry wins hawaii!
they're saying there's growing irritation from the white house
iowa on hold
yeah, this is becoming 2000 again
heh
crazy
it's changed in the last hour
i'm impressed they predicted this Ohio thing months and months ago
i know
florida loses the goat image
scapegoat
itmay relocate to cincinnati
heh
frank is very upset about the returns tonight
it will be cool
i'm sure
stella is very cute these days
;yeah?
getting fluffy
tina is out cold right now
as is the kitty and frank

you are what's wrong with america
damn you and you're manhands
ola
tina just did a big turnover and upset frank's space
i'm america's worst nightmare
i'm so stoked you did the silent protest.
nice work man
i wish you had pics
thanks. I was pleased. I was compelled
it's harder to get compelled here in cali when it's a dem state
lots of peeps around here traveled to ohio and fla.
i just couldnt' do it...too much work, new job, ya know
11:40 PM
i'm gonna bail soon.
nice talking w/you. Too bad the world may end
yeah
ok. it's not that bad....maybe
maybe
i'm unsure about everything
i lose faith in my country tonight
whatever happens
i lose faith in my country tonight